I Want To

I want to give it all up to a thoughtful mind,      
       
I'm fed up with thoughtless selfish endeavours.      
       
I want to learn how to perform and sing love duets again,      
       
Not alone in the audience cheering them on falsely.      
       
I want to be boring, live a simple life if I choose      
       
Not told in knowing glares and silent tones the colour I should think in.      
       
I want to hear I love you, know what it truly means to  
hear it without promise or favour returned      
       
Not to be told I love you as your cock awaits to be serviced.      
       
I want fine wine poured out, mellowed over the years,      
       
Rather than the sour taste left from fakes that were        
labelled to attract.      
       
I want to learn all over again, to be able to express with      
words and actions, free to speak, to teach new tricks found,    
old ones remembered      
       
Not void of ideas with the same dirty bitch routine, played out    
like it's groundhog day.      
       
I want to smile because I feel alive with you      
       
Not smiling.. because I cant wait to get away from you      
       
I want experienced touches in love and life, to be part of    
the big picture      
       
Over young wanting to play out their every fantasy and        
whim with me wearing the bad girl lead.      
       
I want the noise and bustle that family life brings      
       
Not the silent noises in my head that you create so well      
       
I want to do everything possible because I desire to,      
       
Not because I have to.      
       
I want to be looked at for love and love alone,      
       
Not looked at because I'm a convenient twitch down there as I    
walked past.      
       
I want to be in control of your pleasure as you will be with    
mine,      
       
Not the no feeling or control as you work for your own.      
       
I want to sip slowly love's nectar from the bottle, hearing
the pleasure cries of release driving me on to please,      
       
Not me struggling for release as you push my head down      
driving it home with unnecessary force.      
       
I want the hard times and the poor to start to walk up        
one step at a time together with you,      
       
I don't want to walk up anywhere with you for richer or for    
poorer.