Purgatory

This world loses me, It is too much to bear,
The tornado wind and the butterfly, this mind and body are tired.
You are the crocodile in my nightmares, you snap at pride, you swallow my innocence, you killed the chld inside me.
I survived.
I live on still and it is a wonder, though not the same; I am a skeleton in my own closet.
But I am many things:
A crook, a thief, a bandit,
a Grand-daughter,
and Easy Prey.
Will I love you? It screams to me, the blood of roses and fake promise of hope is poison.
I claw at my heart and the red wails at me,
like loving knives in my skin, the love is a lie and only pain.
Thorny tendrils of poison ivy wrap around my life and soul, the parasite that is You, sucking my light and vitality, piercing me, so I bleed slowly on your hands.
You killed the child inside me, and the Purgatory is there, as vivid in my dreams as the harsh sunlight, that exposing glare drowns my sleeves in red, my eyes in red, my hands in red.
The drug soothes me, warm fingers caressing my temples and bringing me a spinning numbness.
I sleep a restless sleep, memories that need to be remembered skulk in the darkness and torment me!
They hold my sanity in chains and I am blind...
Don't cry. Lift up your head. You are helpless,
your mother is not yours,
do not fail yourself.
The smell of blood, hot in the August night haunts me, it is metallic in my mouth,
and runs over my eyes;
so all I see is blood.
Sell your soul and seal it with blood, lose your innocence to karma.
The child within is dead, and you marry the empty shell.