peace with myself

with every breath,
I feel everything start to turn
and as it does
my heart starts to fall
everything is falling apart
and who's to blame?
is it myself?
did I hold out too long?
what can I do?
to prevent this again?
people make me feel small,
and to make myself feel better
I build myself up,
knocking everybody else down
destroying anything in my path.
how can I prevent this?
is there any preventing this?
or am I ganna last the struggle?
trying to make peace
with myself.