deepundergroundpoetry.com
In Her Command
If there are angels all around then should he perish the thought
of what she does to him?
Not being a violent man two outcomes;
she is responsive and he fulfills the desire which was only
an attraction of pen but morphed with one graphic
or the reply is in the negative
to which masturbation is the most likely course
Does she know the effect, is that even the intent
the purple hue that envelops her form
the fishnet stockings and the need to feel his launcher
pressed against the fabric as she vocalizes her state
The sister can stop traffic if she so desires
the suitors in the form of the pen turn on the charm
surely he isn't the only one who given the chance
would like a sensual exchange to become a reality
But the substance of her being would enthrall even
the most cynical and create an affinity which
goes beyond the birds and bees
an affinity which wants her smile to
start the day
and her kiss
to end the night
of what she does to him?
Not being a violent man two outcomes;
she is responsive and he fulfills the desire which was only
an attraction of pen but morphed with one graphic
or the reply is in the negative
to which masturbation is the most likely course
Does she know the effect, is that even the intent
the purple hue that envelops her form
the fishnet stockings and the need to feel his launcher
pressed against the fabric as she vocalizes her state
The sister can stop traffic if she so desires
the suitors in the form of the pen turn on the charm
surely he isn't the only one who given the chance
would like a sensual exchange to become a reality
But the substance of her being would enthrall even
the most cynical and create an affinity which
goes beyond the birds and bees
an affinity which wants her smile to
start the day
and her kiss
to end the night
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 11
reading list entries 3
comments 22
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re: In Her Command
...power is given. Very interesting write with some very ironic parallels. Though one certainly must be smitten ; ) I like the latent eroticism yet it is painted on in a very unobtrusive manner.....iErotica. I dig it.
1
re: Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 3:43pm
you often have a way of pointing out aspects that I don't always pay attention to! Thanks for the thought provoking comment.
Re: In Her Command
Anonymous
4th Nov 2013 3:30pm
Nice erotica....as always
Enjoyed
Kitty
Enjoyed
Kitty
1
re: Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 3:44pm
Re: In Her Command
Anonymous
4th Nov 2013 3:33pm
JazzMan!! your words though somewhat indirect are so true, so enlightening. I love this from you Sir.
1
re: Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 3:46pm
I tend to write in the first person so I made a conscious attempt to NOT TO with this attempt. I thank you for letting me borrow your eyes for a few minutes.
Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 4:06pm
Ahhhh! I envision walking a cross the sand, as the wind controls my Donna Karen sundress, hearing these words uttered in a whisper. Flabbergasted!
Follow ups are in the greatest response seeps in my heart.
You're incredible! Xoxo
Follow ups are in the greatest response seeps in my heart.
You're incredible! Xoxo
1
re: Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 7:14pm
From the beginning of time man has struggled to get on paper the majesty and splendor of bonding with a woman. I don't think we will ever get it all. Kudos for the kind regard.
Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 6:15pm
....who is the hot mama that has this type of command, I'd like to sip from her gold chalice and obtain such power...
Very sexy ink, Jazz....Xo
Very sexy ink, Jazz....Xo
1
re: Re: In Her Command
well this is a generalization but I don't think she lives in Oregon. Too busy piercing every body part, inking every body part, or finding some other way to deal with the lack on sunlight. Even have a vegetarian strip club that was made famous by the senator elect from New Jersey, who is good buddies with Obama.
Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 7:19pm
Whoa bro! You continue to ink superb pieces that make one think, although the subject is adult in nature
There's so much one can learn from this as well so I may have to begin calling you 'professor Jazz' lol
Very nicely done!
There's so much one can learn from this as well so I may have to begin calling you 'professor Jazz' lol
Very nicely done!
1
re: Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 7:23pm
hmm maybe that will be the incentive I need to get the doctorate! I can't take much of the credit---we have some very attractive female writers amongst us. Their beauty can been seen both on the inside and out.
Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 7:46pm
wow its like a story told by a narrator .... the way I was reading it made me feel as if I was watching a play n u r announcing the scenes .. most erotic poems that I've read so far is about the author's experience or imagination with 'I' and 'my' used a lot to convey their story , which I love .. but this was a bit different since u r standing outside the piece trying to tell a story of two different people..very nice .. thank u for offering us a new outlook ..
write on
cyanide....
write on
cyanide....
1
re: Re: In Her Command
9th Nov 2013 9:54pm
Thanks. You and a few other writers hear have a wonderful ability to bring out things I don't really focus on so much when I am attempting to construct something, with my only goal being to come up with something that keeps my interest.
I am humbled by your comments.
I am humbled by your comments.
Re: In Her Command
4th Nov 2013 9:40pm
Your poem speaks to me -- it touches me personally somehow as a woman.....
Enjoyed the read immensely.... :)
Enjoyed the read immensely.... :)
1
re: Re: In Her Command
9th Nov 2013 9:56pm
Thank you. Maybe it is like that clock---even one not working is correct two times a day. :)
Re: In Her Command
Anonymous
5th Nov 2013 1:12am
One of your best, in my opinion.
1
re: Re: In Her Command
9th Nov 2013 9:58pm
Thanks---I think the writer is the worst to try to identify the best so your comment is much appreciated.
Re: In Her Command
6th Nov 2013 1:48am
The perspective n perceptions of this ink Jazz my friend completely blew my mind. I don't, or should I say I normally don't read much erotical inks...but God Damn ! Your ink has me converted . Phew !!
KG
KG
1
re: Re: In Her Command
9th Nov 2013 9:59pm
Thankfully as Led Zep say in their most famous, "there is still time to change the road you are on". :)