deepundergroundpoetry.com

Depression

Sometimes it's just a tug that I can feel gently pulling at me over and over like waves lapping at the shores of a beach...a process that little by little causes me to lose more of my grip on reality, until at last I can't hold on any longer, and the current slowly carries me back out, draining my energy until I sink into the dark abyss that I've fought over and over to escape.

And then sometimes it's a sudden push, like a monstrous wave that comes crashing down upon me, throwing me far under the surface before I can even take a breath. Then just when I think I won't make it, I resurface. I take a deep breath, trying to take in as much air as I can, shuddering at the horror I just experienced, when suddenly another wave comes smashing down on me, knocking me deep into that dark abyss once more. Over and over these waves rain down on me, each one varying in size, and each one more painful than the last. I can't just die or escape because I resurface right before I think it's too late...all I can do is take that breath every time, and pray for the horror to end soon.