deepundergroundpoetry.com
You Killed Her
She Stopped Crying In An Instant And Grabbed A Knife. .
She Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times. .
The Pain That Knife Inflicted On Her. .
Was Nothing Compared To What You Gave Her. .
That Oozing Blood, Stained Her Clothes. .
Your Bloody Mouth Stained Her Character. .
The Closing Eyes Faded Her Vision. .
Your Actions Faded Her Chances Of Living. .
She Had Few Breaths Left, She Called Out Your Name. .
You Were Busy Laughing With Your Mates, You Didn't Listen. .
She Died That Night, But She Wanted To Live. .
You Didn't Slash Her, Yet You Killed Her. .
-Vijeta <3<3
She Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times. .
The Pain That Knife Inflicted On Her. .
Was Nothing Compared To What You Gave Her. .
That Oozing Blood, Stained Her Clothes. .
Your Bloody Mouth Stained Her Character. .
The Closing Eyes Faded Her Vision. .
Your Actions Faded Her Chances Of Living. .
She Had Few Breaths Left, She Called Out Your Name. .
You Were Busy Laughing With Your Mates, You Didn't Listen. .
She Died That Night, But She Wanted To Live. .
You Didn't Slash Her, Yet You Killed Her. .
-Vijeta <3<3
Published 16th Jul 2013
| Edited 1st Nov 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 2
reading list entries 0
comments 2
reads 935
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
23rd Jul 2013 6:53am
I like this but to many she's in it!
For instance yours
She Stopped Crying In An Instant And Grabbed A Knife. .
She Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times. .
Mine
She Stopped Crying In An Instant
Grabbed A Knife. .
Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times.
in poetry what I've learned so far is repetition is blah
makes the poem sound the same
Also the capitalization of every word isn't needed
But the story is nice
For instance yours
She Stopped Crying In An Instant And Grabbed A Knife. .
She Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times. .
Mine
She Stopped Crying In An Instant
Grabbed A Knife. .
Slashed Her Wrist Innumerous Times.
in poetry what I've learned so far is repetition is blah
makes the poem sound the same
Also the capitalization of every word isn't needed
But the story is nice
29th Jul 2013 8:33pm
