Fight

Everyday I fight for my will to survive
I'm being consumed by this darkness deep inside
But I refuse to let it win
But what if the only way it will lose is if I
Die
The more I fight the stronger it gets
I can't over come this darkness on my own and
I need to accept that
But how could anyone help me if
I can't even help myself
This darkness is all I've ever known
Its become my home
I'm losing my grip on reality
Who is fake? Who is real? Who to trust? What to feel?
I don't even know what is real anymore
I'm slowly losing control
It's like my mind doesn't want me to let go
Of the past
The pain and suffering still feels so real
The more I let myself remember and feel
The harder the grip this darkness has on me
What if I never find the light
Will this lead me to meet my demise by suicide
Will I ever know what happiness even
Feels like