Shattered Dreams

The days were bright with hopes and dreams
But now my heart is filled with screams
The promise of one day things will change
Has proven false and will cause derange
What was most important and first place
Has put a fake smile on my face
No more arguing as a daily venu
But the new things on lifes menu
Caused my hope to fade away
And a daily obsession to fade away
Reciprocating benefits rarely in the bed
Has caused chaos within my head
Friendship love was not my desire
It sparked the flame but did not make the fire
I was allowed to once again be my self
To climb down off the shelf
To be adventurous in life and bed
To free my desires from my head
A few months of being free
Feeling the joy of be me
Now trying to force myself back in the jail
Has once again turned into a living hell
To give my fullest to a hope of "one day"
When change is not seen in what you say
The rest of my years like a begger on the street
Being at your mercy by your feet
Wishing and wanting to be free
To explore, have fun, and be me
Hope is fading very fast
Not really sure how long i can last
I feel i have become anothers pest
From what i thought was being my best
If the switch goes off within my head
Will i revive once my dreams are dead?