Crap Breakfast

There's a guy I know who eats
His daily breakfast on the toilet
Isn't that disgusting?
Having breakfast in the loo?
He takes his bacon buttie
And the Daily Whatever-You-Call-It
And sits there on the lavatory;
Eating, reading and having a poo.

Now I know this throws up questions
Of a quite diverse variety
Like "What about the awful smell?"
And "Where do the crumbs drop?"
But I just think it's sad
That we now live in a society
In which it's perfectly normal
To eat breakfast "on the plop"