deepundergroundpoetry.com
shadow box
panic at the disco, brimstone
armegeddon's over, touchdown dance, endzone
tip-toe through the tulips, bullets, and primrose
sipping to the sickness, new dawn, mimosa
raise a toast to the robot and his potion
auto hack the gadgetry
like you're spose'd to
but what most do:
blue pill, comatose, iphone
new app, perpetual madness, ringtone
sword stuck in stone
hypo spiked to bone
plan B: morose poems
halflife, methadone
the paradigm condones the impatience
weak art laid to waste
at the wine tasting
bezerker work
flirt with the endtime
school girl, dropped skirt
convert the mundane to ethanol
murder the empath at the impasse
and the diseased stars with propofol
the next show has started at climax
open audition, closed curtain, role call
armegeddon's over, touchdown dance, endzone
tip-toe through the tulips, bullets, and primrose
sipping to the sickness, new dawn, mimosa
raise a toast to the robot and his potion
auto hack the gadgetry
like you're spose'd to
but what most do:
blue pill, comatose, iphone
new app, perpetual madness, ringtone
sword stuck in stone
hypo spiked to bone
plan B: morose poems
halflife, methadone
the paradigm condones the impatience
weak art laid to waste
at the wine tasting
bezerker work
flirt with the endtime
school girl, dropped skirt
convert the mundane to ethanol
murder the empath at the impasse
and the diseased stars with propofol
the next show has started at climax
open audition, closed curtain, role call
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likes 8
reading list entries 3
comments 18
reads 1137
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re: slap box
19th May 2013 2:03pm
Wow, fantastic!
"bezerker work
flirt with the endtime
school girl, dropped skirt "
great write lightbaron!
"bezerker work
flirt with the endtime
school girl, dropped skirt "
great write lightbaron!
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Re: slap box
19th May 2013 2:22pm
O my jesus. so much love for this . a headline poem. what to knock off my reading list so this can be added?
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re: Re: slap box
19th May 2013 5:04pm
Re: slap box
Anonymous
19th May 2013 2:28pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: slap box
19th May 2013 2:57pm
what I am trying to say is that I believe there is a certain Tao to Talking Shit if you can blend indifference with discipline, and marry Intuition with discrimination
Have I achieved this? probably not
Have I achieved this? probably not
re: re: Re: slap box
Anonymous
15th Jun 2013 6:58pm
<< post removed >>
Re: slap box
19th May 2013 3:50pm
Do you know what this reminded me of? REM's "It's the End of the World as we know it." Dude, you could so sing this to that tempo, I shit you not. The near-callous contempt is fabulous, man.
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Re: slap box
Anonymous
19th May 2013 5:08pm
convert the mundane to ethanol
yep, get this one for sure lb
nice real write
strider
yep, get this one for sure lb
nice real write
strider
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re: Re: slap box
19th May 2013 5:16pm
Re: slap box
19th May 2013 6:03pm
Great write!
panic at the disco, brimstone
armegeddon's over, touchdown dance, endzone
tip-toe through the tulips, bullets, and primrose
^^Especially liked this bit.
panic at the disco, brimstone
armegeddon's over, touchdown dance, endzone
tip-toe through the tulips, bullets, and primrose
^^Especially liked this bit.
0
re: Re: slap box
19th May 2013 6:22pm
Re: shadow box
19th May 2013 6:41pm
Terrific, LB. You rocked the shit out of this one. Images like "sword stuck in stone
hypo spiked to bone" are absolutely awesome.
I go back and forth on the ending. Part of me prefers role call, open audition, closed curtain, maybe for the finality of ending with the drawn curtain but role call is such a great pun especially given the poem's nature so I don't know. Sorry I can't give you a more concrete observation there. This poem, though, is wonderful!
hypo spiked to bone" are absolutely awesome.
I go back and forth on the ending. Part of me prefers role call, open audition, closed curtain, maybe for the finality of ending with the drawn curtain but role call is such a great pun especially given the poem's nature so I don't know. Sorry I can't give you a more concrete observation there. This poem, though, is wonderful!
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re: Re: shadow box
19th May 2013 6:51pm
thank you tony... I too was ify on the end, the finality really rested on the copping out of an easy rhyme...and still suits my need I think, or I hope...much appreciation my man
Re: shadow box
30th May 2013 10:37pm
re: Re: shadow box
31st May 2013 2:08pm
Re: shadow box
14th Oct 2014 11:49am