Underestimated

I stare directly into nonexistence.
My talented subsistence only exists,
in a never ending vortex from which it cannot escape.

Forever being the one without understanding.
Forever feeling alone and elapsed from society.
All I ever desired is attention, aptitude but above all,
to be noticed.

When the attention is given, I disregard it.
I cannot bear feeling wanted
I wish to be unwanted, excluded,
driven into the nonexistence
instead of allowing it to direct my life.

I feel underestimated, yet appreciated.
Happy in the darkness I live in, but still unwanted in this epoch