Monster Hair

I wake up and attempt to tame it
Of course, it's not content
I slur a soft song, tired,
Trying to please it
Oh why did I tease it?

I'm so desperate to clean this...
Jungle mess.

I mope around
It starts to growl and cower
Oh, you know that shower
That place you straighten out
Get your act together, beast,
Don't bother, don't pout

I pump it and bump it
I'm scraping away,
Trying to wash it
I lather and smack it,
As the shampoo attacks it

Finally I get out
And suffocate it with a towel
Is it finally dead?
Nope,
Still attached to my head

It flops out of the fabric,
Clings to my neck for dear life,
And cries
It's tears journey down my back

I proceed to poison it with chemicals
Scrunch. Scrunch. Scrunch.
Silence.
It's waiting for the final blow

I quickly whip out my weapon
And before it can react, I scold it
It's curdling screams are lost
Amongst the vicious roars of my blow dryer