Venting

Pacing, thinking planning to get high as the ceiling.
Caught in a gaze. Better off like fuck my feelings.
Planning to appraise and take on this goal a given.
Painting plenty pictures posed positioned in a swisher.
Still growing older I kept an oath with my brothers.
To love and not forget that love won't run from ya.
Hands to my knees. Eyes to jah ah a long way.
Cant tell you that I'm ready or ready to run away.
The few times I refrain. I seen things never changes.
Took it as a blessing to learn and feel the hurt in gain.
Been around the struggle still I couldn't do the same.
To follow I was lost. I seen to lead my name.
Sickened by the subject so I had to prove my game.
Forgetting what it cost still I pushed to prove my gain.
Stronger by the day. I grew immune to the pain.
Weaker in a moment still I rebuke in the name..
To heal yeah it hurts but its better to ache in vain.
To lose I'm a stranger and all I know is gain.
Last time I was lost and owed it to myself.
I couldn't love nobody else I didn't love myself.
Looking forward to the future. Happiness not my wealth.
Not only in it for myself. Diligent for my health.
Being that I'm the backbone for inner weak self.
Holding up when times get hard. Finding there's nobody else.