Submissions by Nizana (Lauryn)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
My mother wrote poems when she was younger, mostly about love. Later she returned to poetry to express thoughts and desires that she'd squelched over time. She passed the torch to me (her daughter) when she entered treatment.
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
6th Oct 2024 11:32pm
6th Oct 2024 11:32pm
The Women Before Me - Journal entry
October 6, 2024
My daughter is away in the care of her father. I couldn't sleep last night and started thinking about the women who’ve come before me, those whose blood courses through my veins, and whose stories are etched into my life.
Great-grandmother Norma Jean Moore, a woman of the '40s, lived through a time of profound change. Born into the echoes of the Great Depression, she was a child when the world was at war. I often wonder about her passions, hidden beneath the surface of a society that demanded so much resilience. What was it like to fall in love...
My daughter is away in the care of her father. I couldn't sleep last night and started thinking about the women who’ve come before me, those whose blood courses through my veins, and whose stories are etched into my life.
Great-grandmother Norma Jean Moore, a woman of the '40s, lived through a time of profound change. Born into the echoes of the Great Depression, she was a child when the world was at war. I often wonder about her passions, hidden beneath the surface of a society that demanded so much resilience. What was it like to fall in love...
#family
#historical
#love #SelfReflection
#love #SelfReflection
156 reads
2 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
6th Oct 2024 6:21pm
6th Oct 2024 6:21pm
Will I Be Remembered?
Dear journal
My thoughts are troubled. The clear truth is that one day, I will face the same ending that meets all humans. I cannot escape death.
Will anyone remember me when I am ash? Will there be any record of past loves in the ruins of what once was? Will the beauty of nature, the rustling leaves, the chorus of the ocean still sing to me in the darkness that awaits? And the kindness I've known, the gentle touches, the warm smiles – will they carry any weight in that land of nothingness?
These were my thoughts as I lay in my bed missing my daughter. My...
My thoughts are troubled. The clear truth is that one day, I will face the same ending that meets all humans. I cannot escape death.
Will anyone remember me when I am ash? Will there be any record of past loves in the ruins of what once was? Will the beauty of nature, the rustling leaves, the chorus of the ocean still sing to me in the darkness that awaits? And the kindness I've known, the gentle touches, the warm smiles – will they carry any weight in that land of nothingness?
These were my thoughts as I lay in my bed missing my daughter. My...
#animals
#death
#lover
183 reads
5 Comments
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
4th Oct 2024 10:30pm
4th Oct 2024 10:30pm
Necessary Parting
October 4, 2024
Yesterday was harder than I thought it would be. Handing Ava over to David and his wife felt like I was tearing a piece of my heart out and watching it walk away. For five months, she's been my constant companion, my little girl who needed me for everything — especially the comfort and nourishment of breastfeeding. It's been an intimate bond, one that I never thought I'd be able to break, even temporarily.
But after the abortion, everything feels different. The decision to go out of state for the procedure wasn't easy, but it was necessary. I keep telling...
Yesterday was harder than I thought it would be. Handing Ava over to David and his wife felt like I was tearing a piece of my heart out and watching it walk away. For five months, she's been my constant companion, my little girl who needed me for everything — especially the comfort and nourishment of breastfeeding. It's been an intimate bond, one that I never thought I'd be able to break, even temporarily.
But after the abortion, everything feels different. The decision to go out of state for the procedure wasn't easy, but it was necessary. I keep telling...
#daughter
#healing
#MentalHealth #motherhood
#MentalHealth #motherhood
175 reads
1 Comment
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
2nd Oct 2024 3:07pm
2nd Oct 2024 3:07pm
Burden Lifted
Journal Entry: October 1, 2024
My good friend drove me from Dallas to Albuquerque, NM, for a medical procedure that lifted a burden from my life. It went well and I was released two hours after the procedure. We stayed at a hotel for two nights, resting in the quiet comfort of our friendship.
While I was away, my daughter Ava was with her father, David, whose steady presence and new wife, who is kind and respectful, maintain balance in our lives.
I recall writing about my friend's wedding, a joyous time now shadowed by a betrayal and divorce that followed a year...
My good friend drove me from Dallas to Albuquerque, NM, for a medical procedure that lifted a burden from my life. It went well and I was released two hours after the procedure. We stayed at a hotel for two nights, resting in the quiet comfort of our friendship.
While I was away, my daughter Ava was with her father, David, whose steady presence and new wife, who is kind and respectful, maintain balance in our lives.
I recall writing about my friend's wedding, a joyous time now shadowed by a betrayal and divorce that followed a year...
#LifeStruggles
#pregnancy
152 reads
2 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
26th Sep 2024 2:45pm
26th Sep 2024 2:45pm
The Weight of Past Choices
In the quiet spaces between
My panting breaths,
I hear echoes of the child
I once was.
I cling to the body
Of a man I barely know,
Trying to fill the emptiness
Left by another.
Men visit my most private place
But never know me.
Our room is filled with the
Steady rhythm of our lust
Clapping, clapping again and again
Like the applause of one lonely.
The sounds of our flesh
Bring back the weight
Of past choices made
In the glance of an eye,
A shared smile,
Or a groping hand.
My panting breaths,
I hear echoes of the child
I once was.
I cling to the body
Of a man I barely know,
Trying to fill the emptiness
Left by another.
Men visit my most private place
But never know me.
Our room is filled with the
Steady rhythm of our lust
Clapping, clapping again and again
Like the applause of one lonely.
The sounds of our flesh
Bring back the weight
Of past choices made
In the glance of an eye,
A shared smile,
Or a groping hand.
#lust
#sex
263 reads
5 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
24th Sep 2024 3:45pm
24th Sep 2024 3:45pm
Entering the Storm - Unlikely Church #5
Jake entered Sarah’s apartment and gave Sarah a quick kiss as they laughed at their awkwardness.
Sarah stepped over to her refrigerator and said, “I need some water. Would you like a glass before we go?”
“Yes,” said Jake.
As Sarah turned, Jake noticed her soft puppy-like eyes opened wide as if focused on everything.
“Thank you,” Jake said taking the glass.
“Staying busy with school helped me cope with not seeing you for a whole week but it’s been hard,” she said feeling her face redden with a blush at her boldness.
Jake...
Sarah stepped over to her refrigerator and said, “I need some water. Would you like a glass before we go?”
“Yes,” said Jake.
As Sarah turned, Jake noticed her soft puppy-like eyes opened wide as if focused on everything.
“Thank you,” Jake said taking the glass.
“Staying busy with school helped me cope with not seeing you for a whole week but it’s been hard,” she said feeling her face redden with a blush at her boldness.
Jake...
#lust
#philosophical
#religion #sex
#religion #sex
220 reads
3 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
23rd Sep 2024 3:27pm
23rd Sep 2024 3:27pm
An Atheist's Scripture - Unlikely Church #4
Let us seek to understand our existence in the realm of the "already named," a world that is both vast in its cosmic indifference and intimate in its human narratives.
We are mere animals whose fate is sealed in the nature of our mortality. Our ultimate end is known to us all. Death awaits each of us without prejudice or pause. In this recognition, we must face the stark truth that we can gain no knowledge of absolute goodness during our fleeting moments under the sun. Such absolutes are constructs of the mind that seeks certainty in an indifferent universe.
...
We are mere animals whose fate is sealed in the nature of our mortality. Our ultimate end is known to us all. Death awaits each of us without prejudice or pause. In this recognition, we must face the stark truth that we can gain no knowledge of absolute goodness during our fleeting moments under the sun. Such absolutes are constructs of the mind that seeks certainty in an indifferent universe.
...
#animals
#identity
#sex
158 reads
1 Comment
EROTIC POEM
Published
23rd Sep 2024 4:45am
23rd Sep 2024 4:45am
Psalm of Letting Go
Universe unending, hear the plea of one who ends,
Let your continuing presence cover me.
As rivers flow to the sea, they carry my tears,
For within me stirs a life I cannot claim,
A spark I must extinguish, though my heart aches with sorrow.
Naked beneath the moon's glow, I knew love's sweet embrace,
What pleasures we had in toiling the soil and
Planting the seed not wishing for harvest.
But from his seed a tender life began,
Only I remain, alone between the paths of survival and sin.
Does he still remember the grace of my...
Let your continuing presence cover me.
As rivers flow to the sea, they carry my tears,
For within me stirs a life I cannot claim,
A spark I must extinguish, though my heart aches with sorrow.
Naked beneath the moon's glow, I knew love's sweet embrace,
What pleasures we had in toiling the soil and
Planting the seed not wishing for harvest.
But from his seed a tender life began,
Only I remain, alone between the paths of survival and sin.
Does he still remember the grace of my...
#death
#prayer
#pregnancy
171 reads
3 Comments
NON-FICTION PROSE
Published
19th Sep 2024 1:25pm
19th Sep 2024 1:25pm
I Can't Do It?
I stared at the positive pregnancy test in disbelief. Just four months after giving birth to my Ava, I can't be expecting again!
I looked back at my calendar to remember. It was Wednesday, July 31st. I'd drawn a heart shape around it in a moment of romantic whimsy. That heart marked the first of three nights of lovemaking in a whirlwind week. The man was long gone. How could I have been so careless? So easy?
Raising a second child on my own? I can't do it. Should I birth the child and put it up for adoption or have an abortion? These are the only choices I can...
I looked back at my calendar to remember. It was Wednesday, July 31st. I'd drawn a heart shape around it in a moment of romantic whimsy. That heart marked the first of three nights of lovemaking in a whirlwind week. The man was long gone. How could I have been so careless? So easy?
Raising a second child on my own? I can't do it. Should I birth the child and put it up for adoption or have an abortion? These are the only choices I can...
#disappointment
#erotic
#pregnancy
193 reads
7 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
18th Sep 2024 2:26pm
18th Sep 2024 2:26pm
Blessed Orgasm
In the tender clasp of becoming one,
we are bare, souls laid open,
as divine breath whispers through sinew and bone,
blessing flesh with the touch of the infinite.
In that tremble, in that sigh,
we find the earnest truth of our existence,
naked and splendid, spirit caressing flesh,
the world falls away, and we are but life, pulsing, alive.
we are bare, souls laid open,
as divine breath whispers through sinew and bone,
blessing flesh with the touch of the infinite.
In that tremble, in that sigh,
we find the earnest truth of our existence,
naked and splendid, spirit caressing flesh,
the world falls away, and we are but life, pulsing, alive.
#death
#erotic
#gratitude #orgasm
#gratitude #orgasm
394 reads
9 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
17th Sep 2024 3:31pm
17th Sep 2024 3:31pm
Wedding Photographer and the Best Man
Marissa adjusted the lens on her camera, capturing the light as it streamed through the stained-glass windows of the cathedral, painting the wedding party in a kaleidoscope of colors. At 27, she had carved out a name for herself as a talented wedding photographer, her weekends filled with the promise of new unions and the hope of everlasting love—a hope that, for her, flickered and faded with each passing year.
Her relationships, much like the shutter of her camera, were quick and fleeting. She’d married young but divorced two years later. Since her divorce, love had touched her...
Her relationships, much like the shutter of her camera, were quick and fleeting. She’d married young but divorced two years later. Since her divorce, love had touched her...
#confessional
#LookingForLove
#marriage #romantic
#marriage #romantic
195 reads
5 Comments
EROTIC POEM
Published
16th Sep 2024 2:47pm
16th Sep 2024 2:47pm
Among Ancestors
In the quiet of rooms of ancestors, she lay naked face down,
a conduit between generations, breathing in the air
captured by walls her grandfather built
before her own mother's birth. Her legs dangled
silky smooth. They gleamed with a doll-like grace.
The boy standing next to the bed remembers the
knitting needles his grandmother once held.
Her body is an hourglass made of porcelain,
a figurine still in silent dance. Her back curves
gracefully, like a sand dune shaped by the wind,
tapering from her broad shoulders made strong...
a conduit between generations, breathing in the air
captured by walls her grandfather built
before her own mother's birth. Her legs dangled
silky smooth. They gleamed with a doll-like grace.
The boy standing next to the bed remembers the
knitting needles his grandmother once held.
Her body is an hourglass made of porcelain,
a figurine still in silent dance. Her back curves
gracefully, like a sand dune shaped by the wind,
tapering from her broad shoulders made strong...
#beauty
#family
#FirstLove #memories
#FirstLove #memories
192 reads
9 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by Nizana (Lauryn)
