Paintry

I shall not piss    
until I write this poem  
it can burn my leg    
stain the carpet  
poison someone's breakfast  
seeping through the ceiling below  
 
I will not weaken  
or stop to brush my teeth  
until I write this poem  
they can morph    
into black stumps  
strangling me with pain  
until my dentist    
grows rich enough  
for early retirement in Florida  
 
I will not eat  
until I write this poem    
even if my cheeks    
sink hollow  
meet in the center of my tongue  
and my belly swells    
so I can't  see the keyboard    
only its navel's    
Grand Canyon yawn  
 
I will not take a shit  
until I write this poem  
my turds can bloat upwards  
forcing themselves  
out of my mouth    
like demented pythons  
pouting greedy for their dinner  
 
I will not panic  
if the whores of rhyme  
come galloping  
while I write this poem    
I shall resist them and fight  
That rhyming dictionary    
can flare in hell    
before I bend  
to its seductive power  
 
So I thank the God of poetry  
this poem was a quickie  
and all the pain  of writing
only took about one hour