I fear the commodity

I fear the commodity,
through the confusing fear I feel,
that I don't belong,  and I am wrong,
and there was no reason for my being,

so now I know I'm not brave,
see what I need, that I shall bleed,
fall into haze then sleep and then no more,

still and calm i am content,
i think of folk, i laugh and joke,
but i'm alone, yet it's myself i'm seeing,

remember times gone by,
they almost change my mind, compelled to find,
yet I know i must go of that I'm sure,

I see the sky at one with the earth,
when I am found, and bells are sound,
I have joined them as I was before,

as my claret life it does flow,
I will smile, then in a while,
for the first time in my life I will be free...