deepundergroundpoetry.com
Vanish
in the vastness of our lives
we were just a moment in time
like a shooting star with a fleeting twinkle
a drop of rain on a scalding pavement
or a flashing thought lost on the tongue
but in that perishing second
you were my eternity
we were just a moment in time
like a shooting star with a fleeting twinkle
a drop of rain on a scalding pavement
or a flashing thought lost on the tongue
but in that perishing second
you were my eternity
Published 6th Feb 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 7
reading list entries 0
comments 9
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The author encourages honest critique.
6th Feb 2013 6:28am
Welcome back sis xoxo
This is great. But I think all the "a" at the beginning sounds off. Otherwise it's great really. Love the meaning in it
This is great. But I think all the "a" at the beginning sounds off. Otherwise it's great really. Love the meaning in it
6th Feb 2013 6:37am
Thank you, I am glad to be back. I have a lot of catching up to do.
I changed it slightly, I hope it sounds better.
Thanks for the feedback!
xoxo
I changed it slightly, I hope it sounds better.
Thanks for the feedback!
xoxo
6th Feb 2013 6:38am
6th Feb 2013 8:15am
6th Feb 2013 2:12pm
Thank you so much Magdalena. I am glad to be back and to be reading yours and others work again.
Thanks so much for your support.
Thanks so much for your support.
Anonymous
6th Feb 2013 9:34am
Sweet write Rachel O.
Strider!
Strider!
6th Feb 2013 2:12pm
10th Feb 2013 2:29pm
We create memories through choices we make. The sweet ones hopefully outweigh the not so good.
10th Feb 2013 5:01pm
Even if they don't, those are the memories we must focus on the most.
Thanks for stopping by Ken. :)
Thanks for stopping by Ken. :)
