convinient lover

Love sucks,

as a teen would say

but im an adult and love still sucks
it sucks me dry
dry like an old passionfruit been left on the Kitchen table for weeks
I have allot to give, but nothing to gain
thats my pain.

Angst, it never parted from me.

Because love ate me rotton
i never matured like other young women
i tumbled and fell into a deep hole

and i self punished for a long long time,
until
a day stood still
and i found a heart shape on your head
my heart was dead, but your CPR worked well
and so i was and am under your spell,
but
you suck me dry
like a salty dry thai fish dish

oh how I long, just to be loved by you
perhaps all the sucidal thoughts will leave
my wrecked mind

perhaps your not my love, perhaps you are
but i got to move on, ive forgotton to wish on my wishing star
ive forgotton the magic of the world, the splendours of nature
and the deep metaphysical notions that swim in my belly

all i do now is think of you
you drain my essence

i let you go many times, you came back, flying
you care dearly, but sometimes im not too sure
you treat me as a convinience
and as mother always says "convinience is a killer"
so
get out of my head
before i end up dead.