deepundergroundpoetry.com
Covered love..less.
Shhhh..
take a minute
to listen
it's faint
sorta like
a whisper
can you hear it
there's a child
crying
in the distance
just out of reach
a
futile existence
without the assistance
of its mother
Covered.. love.less
born to perform
in the chior
of
quiet angels
humming in hope
choked
by fairytales
I
wish I could
read her a story
calmly
comb her hair back
gently lift her chin
I
would tell her
that worth
doesn't come
in a bottle
that
monsters get scared too..
and mommy
was just born broken
But I
can't seem to find
that child anymore..
take a minute
to listen
it's faint
sorta like
a whisper
can you hear it
there's a child
crying
in the distance
just out of reach
a
futile existence
without the assistance
of its mother
Covered.. love.less
born to perform
in the chior
of
quiet angels
humming in hope
choked
by fairytales
I
wish I could
read her a story
calmly
comb her hair back
gently lift her chin
I
would tell her
that worth
doesn't come
in a bottle
that
monsters get scared too..
and mommy
was just born broken
But I
can't seem to find
that child anymore..
Published 2nd Dec 2012
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likes 15
reading list entries 4
comments 22
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Anonymous
- Edited 2nd Dec 2012 10:42am
2nd Dec 2012 10:40am
Devilish. This is the best thing you've ever written.
Very touching and insightful. Bravo.
One thing- "chocked" - should that be choked?
Very touching and insightful. Bravo.
One thing- "chocked" - should that be choked?
2nd Dec 2012 10:46am
aweee. Missy. If you only knew what it took for me to post this. I have re read it like 15 times to talk myself out of it.. I appreciate you and yes ma am choked. thank you beautiful. Now I must get back to my dark place..lol. to make up for this one..
2nd Dec 2012 12:01pm
No, don't go back, this is ust the kind of poetry that crosses over from well written verse to artistry. This is the path you should follow, the one less travelled... Excellent piece! I have often heard that silence speaks louder than words, so a chior of silent angels can rock the world!!! JJ
2nd Dec 2012 1:06pm
Wow. first thank you sir for the breath taking comment you have no idea what from well written verse to artistry just meant to me. thank you i appreciate that with all of me. I can't see myself ever posting something so soft again but i am overwhelmed with the response. from you and missy.
2nd Dec 2012 12:23pm
This is jet speed poetry, right at it.
in a bottle
that
There needs to be an emotional break, a graphic break between bottle and that...the return does not cut it hard enough...
say either
in a bottle
that
or
in a bottle....
that
there is some technical way to make that span..but it will accentuate the point you've made.... this is mass-accessible and heart-felt deadly. Good hit.
That you had a tough time actually posting this shows the difference between a reaction and a response. Reactions are at the disposal of others, in reaction to whatever. A response is a point of freedom, a point of identity that measures from the center and makes a decision to act or not act from the heart in its health. You made a choice on your own, not from woundedness but from beingness. That's, as JJ says, art.
in a bottle
that
There needs to be an emotional break, a graphic break between bottle and that...the return does not cut it hard enough...
say either
in a bottle
that
or
in a bottle....
that
there is some technical way to make that span..but it will accentuate the point you've made.... this is mass-accessible and heart-felt deadly. Good hit.
That you had a tough time actually posting this shows the difference between a reaction and a response. Reactions are at the disposal of others, in reaction to whatever. A response is a point of freedom, a point of identity that measures from the center and makes a decision to act or not act from the heart in its health. You made a choice on your own, not from woundedness but from beingness. That's, as JJ says, art.
2nd Dec 2012 1:11pm
Well lol. ok thank you. um. yes your right i see what your saying about the break. i shall edit that and appreciate the critique. i take constructive things very well. if only i could get some pointers but after numerous times of seeking them and getting told "oh this is perfect" fuck off its far from perfect. so i have to rely on me. which is why i delete 80% of my posts. lol ok done rambling and not gonna feed your ego anymore.. =)
2nd Dec 2012 1:23pm
I love this it's a break from pure darkness yet you still hold your roots in it so well. Amazing :) oh btw can you check your messages? :P I had a questions
2nd Dec 2012 1:31pm
Oh my faithful dark darling. i cant wait til you turn 18.. lol. and yes i will check..
2nd Dec 2012 1:35pm
2nd Dec 2012 3:32pm
Oooh shit. all is fair in dark and war. so lovely. you have been faithful since my sign on so i am faithful to you.and now i can comment the way i want too on your stuff..lol
2nd Dec 2012 9:06pm
Haha well go through em and comment the way you want :) though I don't see why you didn't before :P
3rd Dec 2012 00:38am
3rd Dec 2012 6:40pm
Beautiful and insightful. I hope you can write more like this, it was greatly enjoyable.
3rd Dec 2012 7:58pm
Move over fatties! I'm jumping on this bus.
Not so dark now huh? Good to see there's a bit of human is all of us. I won't bother with critique or any of that shit because you've got your own thing, and I don't wanna make you cry(that's a lie, i do).
So, this is poetry. Beautiful poetry. Still with your dark essence shadowing the tone.
Not so dark now huh? Good to see there's a bit of human is all of us. I won't bother with critique or any of that shit because you've got your own thing, and I don't wanna make you cry(that's a lie, i do).
So, this is poetry. Beautiful poetry. Still with your dark essence shadowing the tone.
4th Dec 2012 6:14pm
Devilish, this brought a lump to my throat.
I enjoyed the seemingly random breaks. It's lovely.
I enjoyed the seemingly random breaks. It's lovely.
4th Dec 2012 11:08pm
Phew!
Sad but true, I've known a few in my time that resemble several such of the comments made throughout this.
Excellent write Devilish.
Uley
Sad but true, I've known a few in my time that resemble several such of the comments made throughout this.
Excellent write Devilish.
Uley
5th Dec 2012 00:47am
this just put you on my follow list. beautiful piece of art, Dev.... as a mom i totally feel it -- and i'm not there yet, but i'm scared for those moments. incredible vulnerability and 'fearlessly human'. great work, Ms. [:
5th Dec 2012 1:13am
I don't know what to say to these comments. I'm blown away. I can't believe who has commented. Jest I am honored all of you. I was more worried about fans reading this as soft. Yet I preach about not giving a fuck what others think. This came to me in the middle of the night i've had it for a while and kept talking myself out of posting it. Thank you.
5th Dec 2012 1:44am
I sent Uley to your piece I read the other day, and he returned the favor by sending me here. I am glad he did.
Damn Child !
Frankly this is closer than I want it to be. You got "it" Darlin, and I can only see you getting more of it as time goes on. :)
Damn Child !
Frankly this is closer than I want it to be. You got "it" Darlin, and I can only see you getting more of it as time goes on. :)
13th Dec 2012 4:23am
13th Dec 2012 11:30pm
17th Dec 2012 1:40am
