Precious Things Are Lost And Gained

I've lost what many hold dear
I gave it away really
Auctioned off a part of me
to the highest bidder
just to erase his memory
just to make me think
of someone else.
And I do think of someone new now.
I think of the life resting in me.
The precious mistake
I can't fix.
I refuse to fix.
My mistake which shouldn't have happened
is now an incompletible task
The life that he put in me
grows each day
It's not just about me now.
I promised to change
to make a different life, but
I can't bear this child.
It will drown inside me.
Suffocate on the smoke.
I want you to live little one
in another time, another place.
Not with me.
You deserve more.
I will never be enough.
I love you.
Goodnight