vulnerability

When it's all over,  
I'm going to stand naked  
over your corpse    
my body spattered like a  
Jackson Pollock  
reject.  
 
but for now,  
I'm going to smile pretty  
and pretend like I have  
no idea how I  
botched up our little game  
and ended with you chained to the  
wall this time  
instead of me.  
 
and oops  
I lost the goddamn key.  
 
there's too much  
saliva in my mouth  
as I grab the bolt cutters,  
 
to release you  
 
my lips part  
and my lower belly twinges  
with each soft  
snick  
of the blades  
 
I'm breathing hard  
when you smile  
and meet my eyes  
 
so fucking sure of yourself  
 
they use bolt cutters in open heart surgery, you know.  
to get through the ribs  
to get to the heart  
 
I shudder against  
each crack  
each snap  
each splintering moment  
of release,  
and it's me whimpering as I force my way in you  
and grab your motherfucking spine  
 
fuck  
your  
heart  
 
rip it out,  
my tongue in your mouth  
so I can come on your pain  
and leave you sagging against the wall  
 
As I cut the chains,  
you slide down the wall  
body sagging forward,    
your cheek against my ankle  
 
I light a cigarette  
and wonder if I can make  
macaroni art with  
some gold spray paint  
and your vertebra  
 
and I recall that the  
key is in my front pocket