deepundergroundpoetry.com
When You're Broken
There's
Nothing
Like the
Tortured sound
Of
Deafening
Screams
In the
Dead of
Silence
Never
Getting
Out of
Bed
So you can
Watch
The playful
Antics
Of
Claustrophobic
Shadows
Dance
Amidst the
Walls
An
Emptiness
In the hallowed
Chambers
That
Desperately
Clenches
To the
Beating of a
Desolate
Crippled
Organ
The only
Friendly
Company
That dares
Enter
Your
Unorthodox
Habitation
Is a thirty
Pack
Of canned
Bush
And a half
Carton of
Cigarettes
Numbing
Your
Emotions
With the fake
Caress
Of Romeo
And of
Devotion
Attained from
Toxic
Chemical
Imbalances
The unbearable
Waiting
For the last
Week
You paid
Off on
Your
Soul diminishing
Phantom of
Untimely
Monthly rent
When the
Cruel fate
Of the
Streets
Sing to
Your
Subconscious
Once again
Because
It's now
Become your
Only haven
Clutching
To the
Tiny beckon
Of hope
For
A
Phone call
Or maybe
A
Facebook
Message
Reading
You have a
Place to
Rest your head
That
Your not
Completely
Unloved
Unfortunately
The
Disastrous truth
Is that
Your
Irrepressible
Anger
And
Self pity
Is all that
Remains
When you're
Broken
Nothing
Like the
Tortured sound
Of
Deafening
Screams
In the
Dead of
Silence
Never
Getting
Out of
Bed
So you can
Watch
The playful
Antics
Of
Claustrophobic
Shadows
Dance
Amidst the
Walls
An
Emptiness
In the hallowed
Chambers
That
Desperately
Clenches
To the
Beating of a
Desolate
Crippled
Organ
The only
Friendly
Company
That dares
Enter
Your
Unorthodox
Habitation
Is a thirty
Pack
Of canned
Bush
And a half
Carton of
Cigarettes
Numbing
Your
Emotions
With the fake
Caress
Of Romeo
And of
Devotion
Attained from
Toxic
Chemical
Imbalances
The unbearable
Waiting
For the last
Week
You paid
Off on
Your
Soul diminishing
Phantom of
Untimely
Monthly rent
When the
Cruel fate
Of the
Streets
Sing to
Your
Subconscious
Once again
Because
It's now
Become your
Only haven
Clutching
To the
Tiny beckon
Of hope
For
A
Phone call
Or maybe
A
Message
Reading
You have a
Place to
Rest your head
That
Your not
Completely
Unloved
Unfortunately
The
Disastrous truth
Is that
Your
Irrepressible
Anger
And
Self pity
Is all that
Remains
When you're
Broken
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likes 9
reading list entries 1
comments 16
reads 980
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 00:29am
Each of these stanzas is a snapshot of clarity. I like the progression your writing consistently reveals. You blend clarity with a loud smack of revelation.
2
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 1:02am
Thank you Ken, I know I've done well when I get a visit from someone I admire such as yourself. I'm glad you could see the honest insight and pain I wrote down.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 00:52am
Yes. What He said. The last stanza is so very true. A person doesn't need enemies when they have anger and self pity.
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 1:04am
Thank you Shauna, and I completely agree. It seems that it is in our nature to be our own worst enemies.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 4:13am
Ah, you remind of myself...well written, I loved it. I am my own best friend, so enemy shenemy
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 6:49am
Why thank you hun, glad you enjoyed it. And all the power to you, enemies are a waste of breathe anyways.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 5:33am
as always your talent in poetry just keeps getting better and better you rock
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 6:50am
Thanks Bradley, I've come to think of you as my cheerleader haha much appreciated.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 10:22am
Love the pain you have expressed here, its a simplistic written piece that expresses allot of emotion. Great work...
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 11:47am
Thank you, I'm glad it could be transformed into clarity as ken so graciously put it.
Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 2:18pm
oh yes hon! perfect. just perfect and the timing the timing, god teach me that please. lovely work sweet.
xoxo
(P)
xoxo
(P)
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
24th Oct 2012 9:41pm
Re: When You're Broken
Anonymous
30th Oct 2012 2:17am
A string of emotions, enjoyed
![Anonymous](/images/avatars/_nopicmini.gif)
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
30th Oct 2012 2:38am
Re: When You're Broken
8th Nov 2012 10:10pm
i dont see self pity at all, i see a talented fucking poet, who should have these published somehere. I am no poet, but im real and i feelright now im full of anger and need to write about it, if i had every thing you erite. go write a book you would be fantastic, find some publishers, get paid for your talents. i must be boring the shit out of you now, but you have inspired me to write from the soul and be toatlly honest, as i am so full of anger .. gonna do it right now. thank you.x.
0
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re: Re: When You're Broken
8th Nov 2012 10:28pm
Yes, you should! I'm so delighted I could bring forth such emotion and passion from inside you. Publication.. Well I have two of my poems published, not exactly a book but it's a start. I hope you write with everything you have, remember it's all about perception, nobody is "better" than anybody when it comes to art. I will read your poetry to :)