sunset courage

for a long time    
I’ve been the guy    
who did the leaving    
   
the hard man    
the big man    
packin’ up and pissin’ off    
playin’ it straight down the line    
quicker to turn my back    
than turn my cheek    
   
thought there was honour in it;    
by cutting shit off clean    
my bag at the back door    
a letter on the bosses desk    
shed gear ready to go  
one last look  
then piss off    
for anywhere    
not here    
   
you probably already know    
reading this  
real men aint sun-set riding cowboys    
no  
real men are stayers    
who talk it out    
think it through  
who understand the greys    
in between the black and white  
where real lives are lived  
   
too late for me and my woman  
this time ‘round  
already played the I’m–leavin’ card    
as hard as it can be played    
just to make sure  
she knew how much man  
she was fucking  
   
(ever felt  
you let the whole world  
down?)  
   
   
   
some men burn  
their whole lives    
just growing up