Countdown To Doom

I countdown
Time moves with a deadly haste
Every second counts
There's no time to waste

Still I countdown
There's no fun in it
Alone I sit in gloom
Counting down to doom

Companionship makes no sense
Sitting in the midst of friends there laughter offend
None can tell what's waiting for me in no distant time
Horrible pictures flash through  my mind's eyes

Will they shoot me while I'm sleeping?
Send me peacefully away
Or kidnap me in public
And torture my ass to hell?

Oh God I don't want to die
There's so much I haven't seen
But I'm too strong to cry
Whatever it is let it be

I walk with the mindset of a dying man
Doing everything in a rush
Using substances uncontrollably
Can't nobody tell me to hush

I countdown to doom
Waiting for the inevitable in my room
Hoping I won't get to hear the boom
Before my soul finally zooms

I'm the rat in the maze
Trapped I am there aint no place
For me to hide or duck for succour
Just do it now why the mental torture

Which sin cannot be forgiven?
I wish I knew from the start
Truly seeing's believing
Now there's no point turning back

Ahead I match into danger
Paranoid from the looks on the faces of strangers
Trying to read their lips as they conversate
Who can I trust with this my dreadful fate?

To take my mind off it
I gather my crew we brew but when we're through
They go to sleep while I watch all night
Lord this is too much please show me the light

I can't  go to the police,they own them
Neither can I share my dark secrets
I'll only implicate the listener
How I wish it wouldn't have to be this way
Its too late for wishes now

I countdown to doom
Broad is the way that leads to destruction
How was I to know it would end in a tragedy?
Until then I'm trapped in trepidation