Illusions of the unrequited

There is some grim satisfaction
in knowing it’s not about me
that it was never about me

It was about feeling something
outside my station
outside my caste
it was about fighting fate
and falling in love with dreams

We ended eons ago
caught between the changing of the seasons
where it was neither night nor day
we were never on the same plane of existence
despite our desires
to conquer natures truths

And still, I keep looking back
trying to read between the lines
of where we went wrong
and I know
that it began with me
and that I was already running
before I fell into that four letter word
that destroyed as it created

While I’m still chasing what I don’t want
I’m still chasing what I feel
I don’t deserve
and I know now that it’s time to let you go
though I’m desperately trying
to hold on
to a dead end dream

© Indie Adams 2012