deepundergroundpoetry.com
osmotic convection
hindsight's been besotted
her garments, vomit-stained
the hymns have been forgotten
still, the hymns have been ingrained
her garments, vomit-stained
her vision leered and blurring
still, the hymns have been ingrained
and the memories are stirring
her vision leered and blurring
as the vapors pale in thickness
and the memories are stirring
as the oracle bares witness
as the vapors pale in thickness
the hymns have been forgotten
as the oracle bares witness
hindsight's been besotted
her garments, vomit-stained
the hymns have been forgotten
still, the hymns have been ingrained
her garments, vomit-stained
her vision leered and blurring
still, the hymns have been ingrained
and the memories are stirring
her vision leered and blurring
as the vapors pale in thickness
and the memories are stirring
as the oracle bares witness
as the vapors pale in thickness
the hymns have been forgotten
as the oracle bares witness
hindsight's been besotted
Published 14th Apr 2010
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14th Apr 2010 2:22pm
15th Apr 2010 6:08pm
I've read some of your poems on here, and to be honest, the complex sounding structures go right over my head. Where I'm not really keen on rigid structures, the forms you use intrigue me, and I think make your work stand out. I like that, something different. Anyway..it wasn't the structre necessarily that I liked about this particular poem, it's the way certain phrases and words are rearranged and repeated throughout that I like...like a sad echo.
15th Apr 2010 11:00pm
thats the form in this instance, actually :)
http://www.forwardpress.co.uk/04_workshop/workshop_08.htm
http://www.forwardpress.co.uk/04_workshop/workshop_08.htm
10th May 2010 9:41pm
Like Merda I'm not really into structured poetry, just not my thing. I messed around with structures fr a while, even wrote some stanza based epic poetry before I just felt too boxed in. People, like you, that can not only write in structure but THRIVE under the guidelines intrigue me. Well done, like your others.
22nd May 2010 6:32am
thanks:) i am created something like 10 mathematically based forms in the past couple of months. they are all in my galley on my deviantart profile:
www.mrnakes.deviantart.com
www.mrnakes.deviantart.com
