Nighttime stargazing

Standing at my window,
Cigarette in one hand,
The orange glow the only light in my room.
Cloudless skies, a million stars.
A few of the gods' fagends up there too.

A plume of smoke hangs in the air,
I watch it curl away.
In that place again, where it's all doom and gloom.
Nothing seems to fit.
I know that somewhere, something has to be true.

His boxers, his t shirt,
I feel comfortable this way.
Stargazing without my stargazer beside me.
It's not right.
But maybe it'll become this way permanently.

I know, I've said it all before,
'I'm leaving him, I'm done'
Load of bullshit, we all know that, nothing ever changes.
I just accept what he says.
Even though the excuses are becoming more strange.

No, I'm not happy,
Things aren't great at the moment, they won't be,
All the while I feel the need to check his phone.
I'll trust him again at some point,
When he leaves her the fuck alone.

I get my head out of my own ass,
Look back up at the stars and notice they're still there.
While LadyLoss has been thinking of LadyLoss
They've carried on lighting up the air.
The stars will always be there,
They'll always make me think of him.
Maybe I should go to sleep,
And love him again in dreams.