deepundergroundpoetry.com
observations of a dancefloor
Minnows swimming in this choppy water
surrounded by melodic beats
just trying to get to their destination
falsely accused of this familiar place
rocking their bodies with mindless intent
flawlessly shaking their sweat driven torso's to the intrinsic music
the beat feeds the appetite for love
wondering through the crowd
shamelessly wanting the warmth of another pressed against their skin
sharing one common goal
to embrace the sexuality and grace capable to the bodies
surrounded by melodic beats
just trying to get to their destination
falsely accused of this familiar place
rocking their bodies with mindless intent
flawlessly shaking their sweat driven torso's to the intrinsic music
the beat feeds the appetite for love
wondering through the crowd
shamelessly wanting the warmth of another pressed against their skin
sharing one common goal
to embrace the sexuality and grace capable to the bodies
Published 13th Mar 2010
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Anonymous
13th Mar 2010 10:37pm
evocation of the dance scene. Even slightly profound, I reckon, evocation of the dance scene, with a good description of the partygoers as 'minnows', and clear poetic ideas regarding their mindsets. I think you meant 'wandering' as opposed to 'wondering through the crowd', and the almost chewable rhythm stumbles a bit near the end, but other than that I quite enjoyed this piece.
20th Mar 2011 3:19pm
