How I Feel

I started liking you in the beggining of the year. I told you and you said that we can never be anymore than friends. You had liked Alex who gave up on you just because his parents wouldn't let him. You flirted with him right in front of me and you knew it would make me sad. You saw me sad and you pretended that you didn't know why I was sad. You just didn't even notice me and you would ask me why I'm sad when you already knew. Then you got over him and you got mad at me from a rumor he started saying I told him horrible stuff about you when I didn't. You forgave me and I ended up hurting you by doing something I shouldn't have and hurt you. I loved you before all this and I still love you but now you hate me. I cant even face you anymore. I just cant take it anymore. Not being friends. I just want to run away from all of it. I know I hurt you but it wasn't intentional. I was to scared of what you were gonna say to apologize. I was scared you still didn't want to be friends. I am a horrible person. I don't deserve to be your friend. I don't know if we should be friends because what if it happens again. If it happened again I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I can barely live with myself now. People think I am happy but I'm actually sad.