Lost in Love

It came upon me so swiftly that I had
no way of keeping it from effecting me.
I wasn't looking for love but then you came
into my life turning my life upside down.
We started off as friends, neither looking for more than that, but then things changed.
Our hanging out turned to making out,
then our making out turned to making love.
Me and you together felt so very good.
What caught me off guard is what happened
after we finished making love,
a sense of peace and calm washed over me.
I was laying in your arms as it came over me.
It was a sense of calm that I had never felt  in my life, something I wanted to feel forever.
Laying there in his arms I felt as if nothing
would ever be able to hurt me again.
Even though I loved the feeling the fact that
I was feeling what I was scared me deeply.
My life was just get set straight and I was
finally to do what I wanted when I wanted.
Having you in my life as anything more than
a simple fuck buddy was out of the question.
So we continued on this way for some time,
and even though we were not a couple I think some where in my heart we were.
After awhile my feelings grew stronger.
I felt that secure and peaceful feeling every
time that I saw you, not only after sex.
Even with these stronger feelings I did not
want to get into anything, I was single and
playing the field and I loved doing so.
Finally I couldn't fight the feelings any more,
I wanted to be with you and only you.
So I packed up my courage and asked you
if you would like to be my boyfriend, and
to my sheer delight you said that you would.
Now I am not going to lie things did not
always work out perfect when we first
started dating each other.
We both did things that we are not proud of,
and there was a time where I seriously
considered leaving you because of things.
Though when I looked at how you made
me feel and how happy I was with you I
could not give that up with out a fight.
Now some five and a half months later we
are engaged to be married.
Even though my depression brings me down
from time to time I am mostly happy and
that is entirely because you are in my life.
If I was to loose you I do not know
what I would do.
You mean more to me than I think you will
ever even know.
So with this poem I hope you can begin
to understand exactly how much I love you.