Perpetual Derelict Peak

 
There it looms in front of me, steep, mocking and wreathed in hatred, my task to climb, I can’t decline, all else be damned the only way, so intrinsic

I have to climb and slip to my feet, scrambling up the scree until I see the bottom falling into the very top of itself, in repeating concussions of form

Foothold, with my pointy toes, handheld, it becomes brisk and torturous

Come climb, the mountain if you dare

Every ounce of care will be swiped from your soul, once you realise the sheerness of its height

All madness drives you onwards, upwards! Ignorant vertigo vomit enthralled and still the precipice evades all colossal effort

Some eyes will fall to the ground in shame, it’s true, but lonely peaks are but for the few

How much effort can it possibly take?

How much worth can you possibly stake?

Lasso of hope around my neck I can’t afford to falter, conquest of equations galore

Sherpa of madness guide my tongue as I traverse the sheer escarpment carcass of repetitive and tedious actions
Again and again till they become an inescapable and fond malady

Onwards, upwards, onwards, upwards, onwards, upwards, banging my fucking head against this accursed, apocryphal rock

Benighted by terminology
Blood in the eyes and frazzling my mind as I climb

Failure, cannot be shed, ever the present burden

Continue to reach above

Slow ascent, crippling grip, both thumbs up

It is not easy

Howling gales of fallen tears rip and shred at the one who ascends, no way now, no way down from here now

Forsaken heart and drilling deep, I find the strength within

The conquest of mind, this conquest of mine, ‘til my flesh rips away from my frame

Still I will fucking climb

Glancing upwards, tickling grace, fastidious decline of wanton worth belies my extraordinary and inordinate helplessness

Still, onwards upwards, to the laughter of the Gods, no one must know what is precious

No one must know what they laugh at

Onwards and upwards, it can never show

The summit is insurmountable, my will power is indelible

Like an obstinate prick, the skeleton clings, till the dust of his bones are carried on the wind to surmount the perpetual and derelict peak at long last

And with that delicate wind that lifts his bones all repletion of turmoil begins anew

Fermont

All this?

All this, for the secret of laughter?