deepundergroundpoetry.com
Three Clowns for Samhain
- Three Clowns for Samhain -
A Psychological Horror Story
1. Bethany was a little girl of about ten years of age, and she lived in the small city of Easthampton, in the state of Massachusetts, some time prior to the year 2013. She was a pretty little girl, with very light skin that had a rosy tint to it... soft blue eyes that would make any mother delighted to look at and say: “That's my daughter!” and be filled with good cheer... and full lips that always seemed pouting when she was troubled. And Bethany was very troubled! But I will get to that later. Beth had wide hips for a girl of ten, and a plump butt that all the perverts in her neighborhood often stared at whilst their minds imagined what it would be like to squeeze it. And there were a lot of those types in the end of town that Beth lived in, which was the area with all the abandoned factories and the crack houses, the area where prostitutes worked the streets at night, and where in the 1980's gangs ran rampant and drugs were dealt in plain sight whilst the corrupt police did nothing about any of it. I suppose a few perverts and one or two drug dealers was a step up come 2011 compared to the chaos of the 80's, and Beth was lucky to be blessed with very protective parents. She had a somewhat plump frame overall, but not fat nor in any way overweight, and that is expected when it comes to a child of ten years. Think of the body type of Shirley Temple at her most adorable, and that was Bethany all the way. Cherubic, sweet, and smiling as she looked at the world around her with wonder, magic, and excitement. Bethany was a natural blonde, and unlike Shirley Temple her hair was straight and she had neatly trimmed bangs that were parted in the middle. She had light freckles, and even when she was sad she looked beautiful. That was what her father always told her, even when he hit her. That is the problem with protective parents... sometimes, they can be abusive and controlling. Bethany loved to wear floral rompers and colorful sundresses and baggy harem style pants with camisole tops tucked into them. Sometimes, when playing up at the park with her friends, she wore overalls with a striped short sleeved shirt underneath them. She would run around the playground, causing creative chaos and savoring the joys of childhood whenever and in any way she could enjoy them. While at home, her father begged her never to tell anyone about the terrible beatings he gave her, or the screaming fits her mother indulged in all too frequently, or the drinking her parents got up to all the time. Yes, they were very protective parents. But who could protect Beth from them? That was what the little girl always wondered, and often asked God about when she said all her nightly prayers before going to sleep. God never answered, and no one ever cared about her troubles. It was a sad life for a girl who had so much to contribute to this world, so much potential to do something great when she grew up. She had a natural talent for art, she loved classical music, and she enjoyed also a bit of dancing now and then when the mood took her. That was what made her tragedy so truly awful.
- (In 2013, two years after these events took place, Bethany's parents never tried to search and find her.)
2. It was late august and the last gasp of summer vacation was in full swing. Bethany was up at the park and playing with her friends at the playground until five in the afternoon. The absolute latest hour that her parents would let her stay out unattended was the six o'clock mark and after that if she wasn't home then they'd come looking for her. And they knew all her usual places, the playground being chief among them. She had her bicycle chained at the bike racks nearby, and locked with a combination lock only she knew the secret of unlocking. Which made her feel like a secret agent every time she used it. She had a remarkably vivid imagination, though some said she might have been schizophrenic actually. At least, that was the opinion of her psychotherapist. One of her friends was a twelve-year-old girl by the name of Rachel who was part Hispanic, with bouncy curly brown hair that she always wore in a puffy style about her shoulders. Rachel often wore clothing in combinations of black, white, and magenta. On this occasion, she had on a pair of magenta colored shorts paired with a black short sleeved shirt that was very plain looking. Nearby was Rachel's magenta colored jacket, cast on the ground while she and Bethany were playing together. Rachel had dark brown eyes, a ready mischievous smile, and the sort of personality that was partly playful and partly more than a bit of an instigator. She was not a bad child.
3. Compared to Beth, Rachel was very slender and when it came to all her activities Rachel was the far more super active one. If anything, Rachel had trouble slowing things down and being calm. This was due to her being hyperactive, but that for many is simply part of childhood. Rachel was throwing sand all around the sandbox she was sitting in, playing like a girl many years younger in order to be more on Bethany's level. Around everyone else, Rachel tried to pretend to be mature... but around Bethany she could act like a little girl instead of a young girl on the cusp of becoming a teenager. Beth was feeling a bit lazier than usual and she was just kind of sitting on the swings nearby and thinking about all of her problems at home, and the ones she often had with bullies at school. Rachel said to her: “Come on and join me in the sandbox, Beth! It's fun.” but Bethany just said: “Maybe next time, Rachel. I don't really feel like it today.” Rachel then stood up, dusted herself off, and walked over to the little girl. She said to Beth: “What's wrong? Come on! You can tell me, I'm your best friend.” and Bethany said: “No, that's just it, I can't! Daddy said he'll... well, he said I can't tell anybody and that's that.” Rachel, being older and wiser, especially more streetwise, asked: “Beth, he isn't molesting you is he?” and Beth said: “Oh gross! No, nothing like that. He just... he hits me a lot is all. But please don't let anybody find out that I told you, or he'll kill me. I just know he will!” Rachel then put a protective arm around Bethany and she said to her calmly: “I won't! But if it's getting real serious, maybe we should go to the police. Get you taken out of that house and put with foster parents who'd love to have a daughter like you.” But Beth, ever the dreamer lost in a fantasy version of reality said: “But I couldn't do that! They're my daddy and my mommy. They're my only family, and what if the foster family didn't like me. Then they might hurt me worse, or do what you thought daddy was doing to me.” Rachel sighed and said: “Alright, Beth. We won't tell anybody or go to the police. But if it gets any worse, we might have too! Okay?” to which the little girl nodded and said: “Okay.” and by then the six o'clock hour came and it was time for Bethany to ride home. Rachel asked her as she saw Beth getting on her bicycle: “Hey! You gonna be okay kiddo?” and Beth said: “I'll be fine, Rachel! Honest I will. I've ridden home by myself lots and lots of times.” And she was right, she had. But today felt different, and Bethany knew that it was not the usual day. As she sped off down the main road leading out of the park, Rachel had a bad feeling deep in her stomach.
- (The parents of the two young girls remained in denial, believing both would come home someday.)
4. On her way back to the bad end of town where she lived, Rachel passed by the pond in the middle of town and stopped a minute to take a break. She looked up at Mount Tom in the distance, at the series of tall metal towers that dominated the right-most side of the mountain's summit... and she fantasized that they were a many-towered castle in a fantasy kingdom, and that the pond had the legendary Lady of the Lake living in it, under the water, in a grand palace. If there was one thing Bethany did not lack it was a spectacular imagination. The usual old men were fishing at the pond's edge, and there was a boat out on the water with a young couple piloting it. Some children were playing on the grass near the old and ever
spooky cemetery that began next to the pond, to the far right from where Bethany was lost in her bit of a reverie. Everything just seemed so normal! The sun was beginning its' descent into the twilight hours of a late summer evening, and the moon was actually out early on this particular day. Bethany wanted to stay and marvel at all these things further, but she was already late to get home. She got back upon her bicycle and pedaled as fast as she could in the direction of home. On her way, she noticed a man that in his peculiar dress style caught her attention. He was walking through the middle of town, evidently in a bit of a hurry himself. He looked a bit out of shape and appeared to be trying to get in a healthy walk, or perhaps he was on an errand... he was wearing a pair of silky looking pants that were a deep maroon in color with a gold leaf floral pattern upon them. He was wearing also a black long-sleeved top with wide sleeves and which had also a gold floral pattern upon it. Small flowers, in this case, with not a leaf-like pattern to be seen, unlike with the pants. He was wearing around his neck a pendant shaped like a star with eight arrows, a symbol she had never seen before but which she found highly interesting to notice.
5. The man was not tall, just reaching 5'8 in height. He was of an extremely average build. He had some weight on him, which was what gave Beth the impression he must have been out of shape. Yet, he was
moving with speed, purpose, and without losing his breath. So he was clearly strong and healthy to a bit of a reasonable degree, at least. He had long black hair, but the hair had the quality of doll hair, a rather synthetic look which made Bethany come to the conclusion that the man was wearing a wig. He had a round face, grayish blue eyes, an aquiline nose and a small mouth. He had arched, very feminine shaped eyebrows that looked painted on, the way certain fashion models' eyebrows look. And he had long, very doll-like eyelashes of the sort that most women would kill to be blessed with. The man had a very slight double chin, but his hands were very smooth looking in the way women's hands are, and at one time it was evident his fingers had been more delicate and slender than they were at present due to his weight. This was the first time Bethany has seen this man, who was carrying a purple purse slung around one shoulder. He appeared to be out doing shopping in town. He looked so unusual compared to other men Bethany had seen, and the little girl wondered if perhaps he was even a man at all and not some kind of a woman. She had seen people like that from the neighboring city of Northampton, people who seemed to blend genders in some very unusual and creative ways. Perhaps this man performed as a drag queen on the side, or some sort of entertainer. Her imagination, once again, ran wild. She yelled out to him as she slowed while riding past him: “Hey, mister! Are you a boy or a girl? You look pretty.” And she then realized how awkward what she said had been even as the words left her mouth. “He's going to be mad at me, or think I'm being rude or insulting.” she thought silently as his face turned red from very visible embarrassment after which he replied: “I'm a boy. A pretty boy, I guess you could say.” and his voice as he spoke sounded like a teenager's voice more than an adult man's. She asked him: “How old are you?” and he answered: “I'm thirty-seven.” and she said in reply to that: “I'm ten! My name's Bethany. What's yours?” and he said in answer to her question: “Jeremy, but you can call me Jay for short.” She then had stopped her bicycle entirely and walked it over so she could talk to him for a bit. “You look like one of the people from Northampton.” she said, and then added: “You live in town?” and he said: “Yeah, I do. I take care of my grandmother ever since my mother died and my grandfather died. My brother comes over to visit once in a while, but he doesn't really help, he just takes her money and pretends he's doing her a favor by coming to visit. He's a real jerk! So mostly, I'm the last family member she's got left who she can rely on. She's in and out of the hospital all the time though. Earlier, I had to get her some of her medications from the drug store, and now I'm finishing up some shopping for myself. I got some brand new makeup, actually, and am stopping by Big E's to pick up something for dinner tonight.” Big E's had been the grocery store Jeremy shopped at the most since it was the closest to home for him. Bethany so said: “Boys don't usually wear makeup. You sure you're a boy?” and Jeremy said: “Pretty sure!” and the girl then went on, saying: “So what you thinking of picking up for dinner?” and he stated: “Oh, I might probably just get a ready made meal from the selection they have on offer. They put out some good stuff each day, cooked up right there.” Then he asked her: “So what are you up to, kiddo?” and she said: “I'm just on my way home right now. I'm already late, and if I'm not back soon they're gonna come looking for me and be really mad.” So Jay said to her, reasonably: “That's parents for you!” and she nodded in agreement before saying: “See you around town, Jay!” before riding off. Jeremy so thought to himself: “What a nice, friendly little girl she was! I never got the chance to ask her what her name was though.” which did not sit well with him and made him feel a bit at a disadvantage. But he'd given her the fake name he used when he felt uncomfortable telling strangers he real name, so it put them on somewhat of an even ground in that she didn't know his real name anyway. She reminded him of someone he used to know, someone who had been very dear to him, but he tried to put the memory of that someone out of his mind, since it only caused him pain to think about it too deeply. He was hungry, it was late, and he had to be home to check the phone for any calls from his grandmother's doctor, or the doctor's nurse.
6. Bethany had a bad night that night. Her father beat her for arriving home late, her mother screamed at her and said it was her own fault, and she was sent to bed literally without supper like in all the stories of strict parents who do things like that when their children misbehave. Only... she hadn't misbehaved at all, she just got distracted by a couple of things that caught her attention. She was always like that, ever easily distracted by this or that. Tomorrow, she was going to meet her friend Rachel at the library, just to hang out, before deciding what to get up to next. She fell asleep exhausted, had weird dreams about that unusual man and his strange pendant, and woke up wondering what those dreams actually meant. It was a bit of a rush in the morning as she got into the shower, waited to dry off, styled her hair just right, and then got dressed. She put on a pair of very comfortable red bloomer style shorts, threw on a midriff baring peasant blouse with short puffy sleeves which was cream in color, and slid on some knee-high white socks and a pair of red and white sneakers that always went good with this outfit when she wore it. Breakfast was rushed, and promising her parents she'd be home on time better tonight was a chore in every sense of the word given how angry they were with her last night. But they believed her promise... even though she knew she'd probably just end up breaking it anyway... and she grabbed her purse which she had forgotten to bring with her the day before, and then she scurried out the door before her parents could get a chance to change their minds. She raced for her bicycle and then she was off in the direction of the Emily Williston Memorial public library. Rachel was likely already there, and the day was so nice out, with no clouds in the sky except for a few flat and wispy looking ones. Bethany was feeling happy.
- (The school system simply assumed the parents pulled both kids out of school, to home school them.)
7. Rachel was in the children's department of the library which was the downstairs section. She was just hanging out rather than actually looking at any of the books. She had adult taste in reading, so her fare of choice was upstairs. But Rachel knew that Bethany had the usual childlike taste in reading, being but ten years old as she was, and so the older girl felt obliged to cater to her younger friend's choice when it comes to reading material. She checked her watch, noticed it was still early, and resumed attempting to look busy doing nothing while waiting for her friend. Bethany came bounding down the steps soon and rushed over to Rachel and cried out: “Rachel! Good to see ya.” in a very silly manner that made Rachel chuckle. The older girl was wearing a pair of magenta colored shorts with a black sleeveless top tucked into them. She had a pair of white leggings on beneath her shorts, and her magenta colored jacket was sitting on the table in front of her. Rachel's hair looked a little on the frizzy side today, she thought, but the curls weren't that bad in actuality. Rachel said to Bethany: “I thought your parents were going to just up and ground you, Beth! They're way too strict in some ways, and much too lax in others.” to which it felt obligatory for Bethany to say in reply: “Nah! I've got a silver tongue, made all the usual promises... they fell for it, the suckers.” Rachel shook her had, a serious look on her face, as she said to her friend: “Look, Beth, you can only pull stunts like that for so long. Eventually, they're gonna get pissed enough to step up the punishments, and you already have enough to deal with when it comes to that. So, your dad, he didn't hit you last night when you got home so late?” and Bethany answered: “No, but I had to eat good this morning... no supper.” Rachel crossed her arms and said: “Figures! So, Beth, what made you so late? I called your folks to let them know we're be hanging out today and they told me you were a whole hour late in the end. That's kind of pushing it.” And Bethany told Rachel about her stop by the pond and her conversation with that man. Rachel then looked concerned and said: “So, you actually... you stopped to talk to some strange man you don't even know? That's crazy! What if he was a wacko or a serial killer or some pervert?” And Bethany told the older girl: “But he was nice! He said he's taking care of his sick grandmother and was out buying her medicine.” Rachel then smiled and nodded her head as she agreed: “Okay, so... not a creep then. That's good at least! But he sounds really unusual.” Then, Rachel led Bethany outside and said to her: “Let's see if we can spot him again! Together.” and Bethany said: “He was out kind of late though.” to which Rachel responded: “Hey, we've got all day!”
8. Jeremy had slept in a bit, and woke up to get his grandmother started on her morning medications... it was something he'd dreaded since she was always constantly so nasty to him and never listened to her doctor's instructions at all. Everyone in town knew her as the crazy old woman who lived in the purple house, and it was a source of deep embarrassment for Jeremy, and part of the reason he keep seeking to distance himself from anything to do with her, including the family name. He rarely if ever gave his last name to people, and it had to do with how much he felt the family's reputation had been ruined over the years by people like his grandparents and their careless and ridiculous behavior. And they had ever had the nerve to call him the embarrassment! At least he was well liked in town by the one or two most true friends he had there. If anything people felt sorry for him with everything he had to deal with at home. Today, he put on a pair of blue rayon harem style pants, very silky and comfortable... and he had on top a long blue silk blouse with wide elbow-length sleeves and which had on it a Japanese art style pattern. He decided not to bother with the wig today, and had shaved his head and eyebrows as per usual just the night before. He was not going to bother with makeup today either. He was still indecisive about if he was going to attempt to live as a woman or remain presenting himself as androgynous. He had been having bad luck trying to find women to date online, and he realized he spent an incredible amount of time online as it was between his art projects, his writings, and his dabbling with video game design in an amateur capacity. He had never made a single penny on anything he'd ever attempted, nor did he in truth wish to. He was content with making people happy, and money didn't factor into that. At present, he was needed at home almost full time, and he kept figuring that once he found someone, preferably someone very understanding, that then he could figure out a way to turn things around and make his life go in the direction he wanted it to go in. He had been working on writing his book for the past decade, and it was a year or two away from being finished. He planned to publish it once it was complete, and hoped that would take care of his financial worries. In the meantime he told people he was a freelance artist who worked on private commissions for people. In a way, it wasn't entirely a lie even if it was far from the actual truth. He did create artwork he uploaded to DeviantArt online, and sometimes people did ask him to create certain works with certain themes. So it was a white lie that did no one any harm. Breakfast was brief, and it was about two o'clock in the afternoon by the time he was ready for the day. Okay, maybe he had slept in a little more than just a bit! He grabbed his purse, checked the answering machine after his grandmother was settled in watching television in the living room, and then headed out to town after telling her he would be back later, in time for supper. He had his cell phone with him, just in case the old woman needed anything, or in case her doctor needed to get a hold of him. So, he was soon on his way to town and delighted that his brother had not disgraced the house with his rather annoying presence thus far today. Back when he used to do mentoring for the children at the library, it was usually around this time he'd head up there... he'd wait until they got out of school, waited for the regulars to arrive at the library, and then he'd begin the usual routine of figuring out which ones needed help with their homework, school projects, or just about anything else. He had a mind to stop by there for a brief look-in to see if anything had changed since he'd last been there. It was a place he felt a lot of nostalgia for, and he wondered if anyone he used to know was even still there anymore. Things changed very fast during the past decade, in that sleepy town which was now classified as a small city. It was a place where local artists were coming in and changing things for the better, and Jeremy had long ago ceased to keep up with the changes. His mind, and often his heart, was trapped in the past and in golden memories of happier times. Times when he had less responsibilities, less worries and fears, and less of a feeling of his life going downhill fast. “If I could just turn back the clock.” he said sometimes, but when would he turn it back to, if he could! His life has never been perfect, never been even close to good. It had always been a struggle, it seemed, and these days he felt as if he was treading water while caught in an increasingly turbulent sea. If only he could reach land! If only he could find his feet on solid ground.
9. After a while of just searching for that strange man, the two girls rode back to the library and decided to have a look in the adult section upstairs to see if any grown-up books struck their fancy. Bethany was of a mind to broaden her reading horizons, and Rachel sought to accommodate her friend's desire. That was around three in the afternoon, and all of a sudden Bethany pointed toward the door and said: “Look that's him!” and Rachel said: “He doesn't have long hair.” but Beth explained: “No, silly! I told you, his hair looked like it was fake... like a wig. But that's his face, and see? He's wearing that star pendant just like yesterday.” Bethany rushed over to the man, Rachel behind her, and she asked: “Hey! Are you the guy I talked to in town yesterday, the guy who takes care of his grandmother?” and the man smiled and said to her: “I remember you! You were late getting home.” and he avoided eye contact with Rachel as he spoke only to Beth. Rachel then said: “My name's Rachel! This is my best friend, Bethany.” The man then did a short, polite, semi-bow and said to them: “My name's Jeremy. Just call me Jay! I was, to be honest, wondering what Bethany's name was. I just called her 'kiddo'.” Beth then so asked of him: “So, what are you up to here?” and he explained to her: “I used to do mentoring here for the kids, and I did artwork for them that I sometimes gave them as gifts, among other things. I just wanted to stop in and see how much things have changed, if anything. I'll probably have to get a new library card sometime, mine's ridiculously out of date.” Rachel said: “Mentoring is a nice thing to do! Did you do it for pay, or volunteer?” To which Jay made explicitly clear: “I never asked for a single penny. Everything I did, or do, for people I do for free, for the love of it. It wouldn't be right to ask for money from kids' families... and most people who do legitimate mentoring are volunteer, like I was. Same reason I take care of my grandmother, it's the right thing to do.” Beth said: “Would you like to hang out with us? You seem cool, and nice, and maybe you could show us some of your art.” to which he explained: “Well, I did bring my binder and my pen with me today.” and he indicated the black binder filled with plain white copy paper that he held in his right hand. “So I could draw some stuff for you, and you could tell me how it looks, what you think of it.” And Rachel said: “That sounds nice! Let's pick a table in back, over there.” and they walked over to an empty table and chairs in between a space in the rows of the adult section of the library, one that was more to the back and appropriately in the art and cooking section. Jay sketched the two girls faces, idealizing their features quite a bit admittedly, but still making them recognizable, and he drew little hearts and flowers and stars around them. He used a black art pen to do it, and when it was finished he showed it to the two girls and asked: “Be brutally honest with me... how is it?” and so, Bethany's eyes lit up as she smiled and said: “That's so cool! It looks just like me.” and Rachel said: “I knew my hair looked frizzy today... but yeah, Jay, that looks nice. Spot on!” And then Jay told them that there used to be two girls who were regulars of his, so this brought back good memories for him of all those days when they brightened his life. Beth said: “You're so sweet!” Rachel said: “So, how long did you used to mentor for? I mean, what were your hours I guess.” And Jay stated: “I'd get here around the time I got here today, and I'd usually stay with the kids until six o'clock when the library closes. In the case of the two girls I've mentioned, I hung out with one of them until her parents came to pick her up. She was like a daughter to me, as well as a best friend. I miss her a lot sometimes. And Beth asked: “So only sometimes?” and Jay corrected: “Maybe all the time.” and he looked a bit said, as if he was just about to cry, but he smiled in a very forced way and said to Bethany: “Well, the past is in the past, and right now we're hanging out together and I prefer to focus on the present in any case.” Rachel said to him: “That's sensible. So Beth said you're in your thirties? She's ten, and me I'm twelve. Normally, we don't talk to strangers, but a mentor is okay because that's like a teacher and teachers are cool. Usually.” to which Beth said: “That's an awful comparison! Teachers suck.” which made Jay giggle and admit: “Yes! Like she said. Teachers do suck, quite a bit actually. No, I'm more like a cool teacher, not like one of the ones you'd hate the guts of.” Rachel then asked: “So what happened to your eyebrows? I mean, I hope I don't sound rude but you do look very unusual.” And that made Jay chuckle, if only just a little.
10. He said to her in honest answer: “I lost them, along with my hair, back in 2005, the year my mother died. I don't know if it was from nerves, or a condition of some kind I never knew I had, but my hair got to a point where I felt my scalp burning big time and then the hair all just started falling out in bloody clumps, it was nasty and really painful. I've had to shave my head and eyebrows completely ever since.” And Beth said: “That sounds gross! And really awful.” to which Rachel said: “I've heard of conditions like that. Honestly, I'm glad you explained that... because I just assumed you had cancer, or something.” Then, Jay said, with a sigh of relief: “No, thankfully nothing of the sort. I'd be dead by now, if that had been the case, all that many years ago.” Jay then asked the two girls: “So, do you two come here a lot? If so, I might stop by more often so we can hang out.” to which Rachel said: “Sometimes! With school coming up next month, we'll probably be stopping by from time to time for books or to use the library's computers to look stuff.” And Beth, distracted for a moment by Jay's pendant asked him, cutting in on her sister's conversation with him: “Jay! What's that pendant mean?” and he clasped it in his hand and asked: “This? Well, it's called the Arrows of Chaos, and it symbolizes the randomness of creativity. In this case, chaos doesn't mean anarchy or anything bad. It just stands for creativity, and being an artist I always felt drawn to this symbol because of that meaning it has. It has other meanings besides, but that is the one that really draws me to it.” Rachel asked: “So you're an artist too?” and he elaborated with his usual embellishment by saying: “I do artwork for private individuals who pay me to create drawings or paintings for them. I also publish my works online, too.” And he could tell the two girls found that to be very impressive. Rachel said: “Yeah, this town's been getting a lot of artists moving in lately. You lived here your whole life, or are you one of the newcomers?” and Jay clarified: “I've lived here mostly for my whole life. Ever since I was five years old. I used to hate it here, but it's grown on me in recent years and I can't imagine living anywhere else to be honest. This library has changed a bit since I was here... back in 2004, I'd say... I don't really recognize any of these people here now. It's a whole new crowd, by the look of it. I'd have a hard time getting used to that if I was here as much as I used to be.” At which Rachel smiled and said: “I guess a lot can change in seven years.” Rachel and Bethany then said to the kind man who was now their new friend, or rather Rachel spoke for both of the two girls: “So, I'm just sort of thinking, deciding what I think we should do, and maybe we could go for a walk, the three of us. Like, leave our bikes here and just walk down Park Street a bit. It's a nice day for it, and there's no real sense cooping ourselves up in here for the rest of the day.” Jay then asked: “The three of us?” and the young girl nodded her head and exclaimed: “Sure! Why not? Beth says you look like you like to walk, and we do too so it'd be a cool way to get to know you better.” Jay liked the sound of that, and felt it was only good form to please the kids and be nice, so he agreed to go for a walk with them. Park Street had always been one of the longest streets in town, and honestly Jay had nothing better to do right at this point in time anyway. “I'm in! Let's go.” he said eagerly, a friendly smile on his face. They got up from the table, and binder in hand Jay went with the two girls on their walk. It was beautiful outside, not too hot for late August, and there was only a few clouds in the sky and thankfully no chance of rain to ruin things. He'd walked down Park street many times to head towards his neighborhood from town, always on days when he had time to waste and just felt like taking his time getting home. This was the first time in a long time that he wouldn't be walking that long stretch of road alone, and it felt good to him. A respite from what felt like a long stretch of loneliness and a ravenous need for a bit of pleasant company. He wondered if this friendship would become as meaningful as it had been with those girls he had told his two new companions about. But then he brought his mind back to the present, steering it as far as possible from the pains of the past and all the torments from the past that so often kept him up late into the past midnight hours, causing him nightmares that made him wake up screaming. Yes, he was well acquainted with chaos in all its' forms, both the creative and the destructive, and he preferred to focus only on the creative. The world had changed, for him, and yet some things felt highly familiar.
11. One year later, in early October, Rachel... who was now thirteen years old... had begun to notice the strange behavior that her best friend Bethany was beginning to exhibit. The little girl was eleven, and she almost never wanted to play anymore. She was so quiet that she was nearly nonverbal, and there it seemed where signs of an onset of some form of mental illness that Rachel found quite alarming. Beth's parents were at a loss to explain these oddities, and Beth's therapist believes that her schizophrenia was worsening over time. When Bethany did talk, all she talked about were voices she heard, and terrifying hallucinations that she refused to elaborate upon. Something had happened to her, something horrible... which finally snapped her young mind and drove it fully into the oncoming jaws of madness. Rachel came over to Beth's home to visit her one day, and found her sitting naked in her room and drawing a series of gruesome scenes with stick figures. The style was childish, but the blood and horror that was depicted in the drawings were evident. One scene, over and over again, prevailed... a scene of a stick figure of a little girl whose hair Bethany colored to look like her own... who was laying upon a bed in some room while the stick figure of a man was just on top of her. Rachel had a good idea what that was supposed to represent, and the thought disgusted and frightened her. “Beth, it's early autumn, you need to put some clothes on.” the older girl suggested. Beth's eyes were wide and wild, her mouth curled in a wide, crazy grin as she said: “I know! I know. But he'll just take them off of me again. And hurt me.” to which Rachel said: “Who? What happened to you, Beth! Last year everything was fine, we were happy and our new friend was cool and we went on walks and hung out together lots and lots. But then, right after you and him started to seem like you were really bonded you didn't want to see Jay anymore and then you stopped wanting see me either. I don't understand.” and then Beth stood straight up, tore up all her drawings angrily with tears in her eyes, and said: “I know! I know! I'm a bad, dirty girl. I know, and I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.” Rachel then grabbed Beth's shoulders and said sternly: “No! I mean it! No, you are not a bad girl, or a dirty girl, or anything else. You hear me? You're my best friend and me and your parents and your therapist are all scared and worried about you. Those drawings that you tore up, and what you said about someone taking off your clothes and hurting you... did someone do that to you... was it your dad? If it was, this time I don't care... he's going to prison.” Beth said: “No, it wasn't daddy, it wasn't daddy, and I can't tell, I can't ever tell, I promised I'd keep it a secret! I can't break my promise, he said it would be bad if I broke it, that he'd hurt you too if I did.” Rachel was, at that point, screaming inside. She knew someone had raped her best friend, stolen her sanity along with her innocence, and she was burning with rage over it. She had to find out who it was, when and how it happened. “Beth, please... put some clothes on.” and then Bethany put on a one piece baggy jumpsuit from her closet which was a harem style sleeveless jumpsuit that almost resembled a clown costume but which wasn't. She slid on her underwear beforehand, and once she was dressed fully, she asked her older friend: “Do I look pretty, Rachel? Would he think I look pretty, do you think?” and Rachel asked her who she was referring to. Beth replied: “He comes to me in my dreams, dressed like a clown, and he tells me I need to be a good little girl and keep our little secret.” Rachel asked her: “Who? And what secret are you talking about! Is it the man who took your clothes off and hurt you?” Beth nodded, and said: “He's not human, Rachel. I thought he was, but he's not! He's something scary, and now I'm going to become something scary too.” As she said that, the younger girl's eyes began to glow with a peculiar golden sheen of light that passed over them momentarily. Rachel thought it was a trick of the light, but then the light came upon Beth's eyes again and the little girl began to giggle manically with her mouth twisted into a wide grin that was almost unnatural and the sort of grin that could be called insane. Once that happened, Beth walked over to her makeup box and began to paint her face to look like a clown... only without a red nose or anything silly like that. It was more a dark, goth style, and when Beth did get finished with that... she put her hair into a side ponytail and said to her best friend: “Rachel, be honest with me! Do I look pretty... like this?” and Rachel, tears in her eyes, said: “Sure, Beth! Really pretty.”
12. Rachel went to the library by herself that day, headed to the children's section, and there she tried to take her mind off of Beth's insanity and the evidence that so pointed to a brutal rape as having been the cause of it. Rachel was wearing that outfit she had on when she and Bethany first met Jay... during the previous year, in August. It felt strange to be back in the library, one year later, dressed like this, and yet without either of her friends present. She walked over to the rows of books, tried to pick something out to read, anything light and childish and silly to take her mind off of her troubles. Then, she saw Jay as he was walking down the stairs into the children's department. She smiled, her face bright as she waved and said to him: “Hey, Jay! Over here.” and the man walked over to her. He looked careworn, as if he had all the problems of the entire world on his shoulders, and his face looked sad. His head was shaved as usual, and as usual so were his eyebrows. He was wearing a pair of long baggy looking forest green women's dress pants, tied at the waist with a black cloth belt. And over that, he had on a blue sweater with puffy looking sleeves. He was dressed for the autumn season, and he was wearing some elaborate looking style of makeup which would not have been all that glaring except for the fact that he perhaps had on a little too much blush at the cheeks and a bit too colorful a style for his eye makeup. It looked almost clown-like in some ways, but more goth. He had thick black eyeliner and black eye shadow on his eyelids, in stark contrast to the olive green upper shadowing above the lids, and the orange coloring above that. It was a very autumn look, but a colorful one, as stated previously. The black mascara that he had on brought out the long length of his eyelashes to almost doll-like proportions. He had on some blood red lipstick that completed his look, and some orange glitter over the orange section of his eye makeup. It was reminiscent of something either a dancer or a drag queen would do for makeup. That, or a prostitute trying to look “exotic” for her client. Rachel thought it was eccentric, but she'd seen him in looks like this before so it did not bother her overtly. She said to him as he approached: “Hey there!” to which he answered: “Hey, Rachel! Where's Bethany? Last time we got together, she seemed really kind of down to me. Is she doing okay?” And Rachel said: “I don't wanna talk about it here. Let's go for a walk, we can talk about it easier with no one to overhear us.” But Jay looked worried. He asked in an insistent way: “Why? What's happened to Beth?” but Rachel didn't say a word until they were halfway down Park Street, passing the grounds of the Williston Northampton School, which was basically some kind of a boarding school for the rich kids in town. It was the main feature of the far end of Park Street. Then, when they got to that point, Rachel said to Jay: “Jay, I think Beth was raped. And it's driven her crazy. She keeps making drawings about it and ripping them up, and she told me some guy took all her clothes off and... he hurt her, as she worded it. I had all I could do to get her to put her clothes on, and when she did, she decided to try and make herself look like a clown. Almost as if she was emulating a style like you have.” Jay then cleared his throat and said: “Well, she and I were very close before what happened... happened. She kind of was starting to look up to me in a lot of ways.” Rachel said: “Yeah I know, that's what concerns me so much. I mean, we were with her more than her own parents were, and whenever I couldn't be there for her you were. You two were practically inseparable after a while! I just can't figure out when, where, or how some creep could've even had the time to... grab her. Also, she has these freaky nightmares about some guy dressed like a clown who comes to her and tells her not to talk about whatever the hell it is that happened to her. But it's not like she ever went to a circus or a place I could see a clown being at. But it's beginning to look like she was raped by... a clown.” Jay said, in an attempt at lightening the mood with some humor: “A clown? This... it's like a Stephen King story at this point, only a whole lot worse because this is real.” And Rachel nodded her head and admitted: “It is a lot like a horror story, and that's what's scaring me. It doesn't make any sense!” But then Rachel said: “Oh my God! Wait a minute... a clown. No, that's not possible. Forget I even thought that for a second.” and Jay asked: “Thought what, Rachel?” to which she answered: “Well, the closest person I know of who looks kind of clown-like at times is you, with your makeup and baggy colorful clothes, and stuff.”
13. Jay then asked her: “So, you think I did it?” to which she answered: “No! Of course not, like I said don't even worry about it, it was just a coincidence I happened to notice is all.” And then Rachel asked: “Hey, Jay, can I crash at your place for an hour or two? I didn't get much sleep last night, I just kept on worrying about Beth and it kept me up until I could visit her this morning. And now, after all the drama that caused, I just need some good sleep and we're closer to your neighborhood right now than mine. If that's okay with you, I mean.” To which Jay answered: “Sure, why not! My grandmother had to go to the hospital again, so right now I have the whole place to myself. I'd love the company, actually, and it would be cool for you to finally get to see where I live. Beth's been there before, but you haven't.” and at that point, had she been smarter Rachel would have realized the terrifying truth. But she was tried... and needed someone she could so trust with what she knew had happened to Bethany. Jay was the one friend they both had in common, the one adult they felt they could trust more than their own parents. It was what made this tragedy so much crueler and more twisted. It was a purple house in the middle of Winter Street, which was just down Ward Ave, which cut left off the section of Park Street just past the end of the aforementioned school's grounds. There were tall pine trees out front, and the back yard was overgrown. The house looked to be in a state of decline, its' stucco walls cracked in places. It was, in short, a wreck of a place on the outside. Inside, it was normal looking if a bit dark due to the windows being smaller than they should have been. The lights were on, but it still was dimmer than it should've been. Jay explained: “So up the steps off the driveway is the back porch, right there. And the kitchen is right inside.” They went inside the house, and Jay showed her each room. “The first room is a den, it contains some of my books, comics, dolls, board games, and collectibles. The second room down the hallway right there, that's my room. Across from that is the bathroom, down a ways is the living room and my grandmother's room is off of that, but it's cluttered to kingdom come. The only comfortable bed is in my room.” Rachel said: “I'll take it!” and Jay led her into his bedroom and closed the door right behind them as they went inside. The room was filled with more bookshelves, stuffed animals, dolls, and collectibles. A computer desk was on one wall, the bed was across from it on the other wall, and a Wiccan shrine, or at least what seemed to be one, dominated the wall on the far side of the room from the door. Another door just led into a closet. Rachel laid down on the bed, stretched out, and fell fast asleep. When she woke up, it was two hours later and Jay was laying next to her, his fingers caressing her hair as he said to her softly: “Wake up, princess! Or would you like a magic kiss?” to which she... thinking he was just being silly... puckered her lips. He suddenly kissed her, a very passionate kiss too, and she gasped as her eyes went wide. She pulled back from the kiss... and said: “Jay! What the heck are you doing... do I look like a Disney princess to you?” to which he answered: “No, you're prettier by a big margin. Don't worry, I washed off my makeup for now.” And she realized he was caressing her in very inappropriate ways. But part of her found him attractive, and she didn't want to make him upset so she said to him: “So, you're playing the role of the handsome prince?” to which Jay said: “I prefer the term pretty to handsome, but I don't mind the role of the prince if you don't mind being the princess.” It was clear to her by his words that he thought of this as some kind of fairy tale come true. She said then to him: “So, did you play Disney princess and prince with Beth too, Jay?” and he asked her what she meant by that. She knew he was the one who had raped Bethany, and this to her was the confirmation of his true twisted nature. She said to him: “You know what I mean.” She hoped she could get him to... in some way... admit to it. He said to her: “Bethany's not here right now, but you are.” and the way that he said that, in such a soft tone of voice, an almost soothing one, sent chills down her spine. She caressed the side of his face, tried to make him think she was interested in him in this way, as she said: “You're right, she's not here. So... what have you got in mind? Something to take our minds off of her, I hope.” and he kissed her again, and this time she returned his kiss with equal zeal. She hated doing this, and if she was correct in her suspicions this man was a monster. But, she needed to search for any advantage.
14. That night, as she showered back at her home... Rachel tried to tell herself, that she could keep Jay's secret, that she could be what he wanted and needed her to be. She was hesitant at first, unwilling even, but something changed after they made love. She felt different. She never told him about the glow that she saw in Bethany's eyes, but she hadn't needed to. That glow was now in hers as well. He had opened her eyes to a different reality, just as he had with Beth, and now the two girls were bound to keep ever and always his secrets. Terrible, eldritch secrets! He wasn't human like they both had thought he was... but he wasn't exactly a monster, either. He was something indescribable and terrible and horrifying, but she could not refuse him. Any more than Bethany could. No one would ever discover the truth in regard to what happened to Beth... everyone just figured that she was crazy is all... and she'd hidden the sexual and supernatural aspects of her assault from everybody to such an extent that even if they suspected she had been raped they would have chalked it up to an imagined scenario born of deep psychosis. She had never been seen by a doctor to confirm whether she was still a virgin or not anymore. But she was not, and not just physically. Her mind was defiled as well. And now, Rachel was becoming like her, only in the older girl's case she was more in control of herself, more able to accept the changes she felt in her mind and body. The hour of her defilement at Jeremy's hands was now, to Rachel, like unto the sort of moment of rebirth that could be seen as akin to a phoenix rising from its' own funeral pyre. The old her was ashes now, and what had replaced it there was no name for. “No, he wasn't human after all.” she'd kept on muttering to herself while in the shower, adding: “But then again, I have no room to talk. Now that I'm not human anymore either.” What broke Bethany only strengthened Rachel, and both girls had become bound to the will of the demonic entity that existed within the seemingly human form of Jay. After her shower, Rachel searched her closet for anything even remotely resembling clown attire. She found a pair of baggy pants that looked pretty close to either harem style pants or clown pants, and she put them on, tying the drawstrings. The pants where black with white polka dots, and they matched a blouse she had with short but very puffy sleeves, which had the identical pattern on it. She had put on the blouse first, and tucked it into the pants before tying them. She pulled her hair into two rather cute twin ponytails, and then she set about working on her makeup. She wanted it to look perfect, for him! Halloween was a bit different that year. Jay was not alone when he had visited his mother's grave at the cemetery. The two girls were with him, both dressed in their clown attire. “So, who's up for a spot of trick or treating tonight?” he asked them, and they said in unison: “We are, master!” and he knew that in that moment they were bound to him forever. The little one, Bethany, was always a bit nervous when they got up to mischief like this, but she would not... could not... refuse him. The older one, Rachel, in every way was almost his equal when it came to demented depravity. The darkness in her, called forth from out of Hell itself, was stronger than it was in Beth. She had killed a homeless man in Northampton for him, and Beth had helped her dispose of the body so no one would ever find it. And that was how it was that the two little girls got a taste for blood and for carnage. Their first sacrifice to the unholy god that masqueraded inside the flesh of Jeremy's seemingly mortal form. It was a great warm-up before the night of Halloween, the peak of the Samhain season. Now, tonight, the girls' respective sets of parents thought they were out just doing the usual trick or treat business with their adult mentor friend, Jay, and they always were happy to leave them in his most responsible care. They would never have believed the truth, if someone had even told them it outright. For... the demon within Jay's body... was powerful and deceptive in ways both subtle and perverse. He was dressed in colorful harem style pants, with a very silky looking blouse with long billowing sleeves. His face was painted like a clown's, but without a red nose and with distinctly goth styling. He had a carving knife in his carrying bag, and other tools. The girls brought tools of their own in their purses. “Time to bring the fear back into the Samhain season!” he proclaimed, with a chuckle, as his face broke into a terrifying grin. A new girl, Sarah, joined them.
- (Rachel and Bethany went missing, in early 2013... it was never reported, and their fate is unknown.)
A Psychological Horror Story
1. Bethany was a little girl of about ten years of age, and she lived in the small city of Easthampton, in the state of Massachusetts, some time prior to the year 2013. She was a pretty little girl, with very light skin that had a rosy tint to it... soft blue eyes that would make any mother delighted to look at and say: “That's my daughter!” and be filled with good cheer... and full lips that always seemed pouting when she was troubled. And Bethany was very troubled! But I will get to that later. Beth had wide hips for a girl of ten, and a plump butt that all the perverts in her neighborhood often stared at whilst their minds imagined what it would be like to squeeze it. And there were a lot of those types in the end of town that Beth lived in, which was the area with all the abandoned factories and the crack houses, the area where prostitutes worked the streets at night, and where in the 1980's gangs ran rampant and drugs were dealt in plain sight whilst the corrupt police did nothing about any of it. I suppose a few perverts and one or two drug dealers was a step up come 2011 compared to the chaos of the 80's, and Beth was lucky to be blessed with very protective parents. She had a somewhat plump frame overall, but not fat nor in any way overweight, and that is expected when it comes to a child of ten years. Think of the body type of Shirley Temple at her most adorable, and that was Bethany all the way. Cherubic, sweet, and smiling as she looked at the world around her with wonder, magic, and excitement. Bethany was a natural blonde, and unlike Shirley Temple her hair was straight and she had neatly trimmed bangs that were parted in the middle. She had light freckles, and even when she was sad she looked beautiful. That was what her father always told her, even when he hit her. That is the problem with protective parents... sometimes, they can be abusive and controlling. Bethany loved to wear floral rompers and colorful sundresses and baggy harem style pants with camisole tops tucked into them. Sometimes, when playing up at the park with her friends, she wore overalls with a striped short sleeved shirt underneath them. She would run around the playground, causing creative chaos and savoring the joys of childhood whenever and in any way she could enjoy them. While at home, her father begged her never to tell anyone about the terrible beatings he gave her, or the screaming fits her mother indulged in all too frequently, or the drinking her parents got up to all the time. Yes, they were very protective parents. But who could protect Beth from them? That was what the little girl always wondered, and often asked God about when she said all her nightly prayers before going to sleep. God never answered, and no one ever cared about her troubles. It was a sad life for a girl who had so much to contribute to this world, so much potential to do something great when she grew up. She had a natural talent for art, she loved classical music, and she enjoyed also a bit of dancing now and then when the mood took her. That was what made her tragedy so truly awful.
- (In 2013, two years after these events took place, Bethany's parents never tried to search and find her.)
2. It was late august and the last gasp of summer vacation was in full swing. Bethany was up at the park and playing with her friends at the playground until five in the afternoon. The absolute latest hour that her parents would let her stay out unattended was the six o'clock mark and after that if she wasn't home then they'd come looking for her. And they knew all her usual places, the playground being chief among them. She had her bicycle chained at the bike racks nearby, and locked with a combination lock only she knew the secret of unlocking. Which made her feel like a secret agent every time she used it. She had a remarkably vivid imagination, though some said she might have been schizophrenic actually. At least, that was the opinion of her psychotherapist. One of her friends was a twelve-year-old girl by the name of Rachel who was part Hispanic, with bouncy curly brown hair that she always wore in a puffy style about her shoulders. Rachel often wore clothing in combinations of black, white, and magenta. On this occasion, she had on a pair of magenta colored shorts paired with a black short sleeved shirt that was very plain looking. Nearby was Rachel's magenta colored jacket, cast on the ground while she and Bethany were playing together. Rachel had dark brown eyes, a ready mischievous smile, and the sort of personality that was partly playful and partly more than a bit of an instigator. She was not a bad child.
3. Compared to Beth, Rachel was very slender and when it came to all her activities Rachel was the far more super active one. If anything, Rachel had trouble slowing things down and being calm. This was due to her being hyperactive, but that for many is simply part of childhood. Rachel was throwing sand all around the sandbox she was sitting in, playing like a girl many years younger in order to be more on Bethany's level. Around everyone else, Rachel tried to pretend to be mature... but around Bethany she could act like a little girl instead of a young girl on the cusp of becoming a teenager. Beth was feeling a bit lazier than usual and she was just kind of sitting on the swings nearby and thinking about all of her problems at home, and the ones she often had with bullies at school. Rachel said to her: “Come on and join me in the sandbox, Beth! It's fun.” but Bethany just said: “Maybe next time, Rachel. I don't really feel like it today.” Rachel then stood up, dusted herself off, and walked over to the little girl. She said to Beth: “What's wrong? Come on! You can tell me, I'm your best friend.” and Bethany said: “No, that's just it, I can't! Daddy said he'll... well, he said I can't tell anybody and that's that.” Rachel, being older and wiser, especially more streetwise, asked: “Beth, he isn't molesting you is he?” and Beth said: “Oh gross! No, nothing like that. He just... he hits me a lot is all. But please don't let anybody find out that I told you, or he'll kill me. I just know he will!” Rachel then put a protective arm around Bethany and she said to her calmly: “I won't! But if it's getting real serious, maybe we should go to the police. Get you taken out of that house and put with foster parents who'd love to have a daughter like you.” But Beth, ever the dreamer lost in a fantasy version of reality said: “But I couldn't do that! They're my daddy and my mommy. They're my only family, and what if the foster family didn't like me. Then they might hurt me worse, or do what you thought daddy was doing to me.” Rachel sighed and said: “Alright, Beth. We won't tell anybody or go to the police. But if it gets any worse, we might have too! Okay?” to which the little girl nodded and said: “Okay.” and by then the six o'clock hour came and it was time for Bethany to ride home. Rachel asked her as she saw Beth getting on her bicycle: “Hey! You gonna be okay kiddo?” and Beth said: “I'll be fine, Rachel! Honest I will. I've ridden home by myself lots and lots of times.” And she was right, she had. But today felt different, and Bethany knew that it was not the usual day. As she sped off down the main road leading out of the park, Rachel had a bad feeling deep in her stomach.
- (The parents of the two young girls remained in denial, believing both would come home someday.)
4. On her way back to the bad end of town where she lived, Rachel passed by the pond in the middle of town and stopped a minute to take a break. She looked up at Mount Tom in the distance, at the series of tall metal towers that dominated the right-most side of the mountain's summit... and she fantasized that they were a many-towered castle in a fantasy kingdom, and that the pond had the legendary Lady of the Lake living in it, under the water, in a grand palace. If there was one thing Bethany did not lack it was a spectacular imagination. The usual old men were fishing at the pond's edge, and there was a boat out on the water with a young couple piloting it. Some children were playing on the grass near the old and ever
spooky cemetery that began next to the pond, to the far right from where Bethany was lost in her bit of a reverie. Everything just seemed so normal! The sun was beginning its' descent into the twilight hours of a late summer evening, and the moon was actually out early on this particular day. Bethany wanted to stay and marvel at all these things further, but she was already late to get home. She got back upon her bicycle and pedaled as fast as she could in the direction of home. On her way, she noticed a man that in his peculiar dress style caught her attention. He was walking through the middle of town, evidently in a bit of a hurry himself. He looked a bit out of shape and appeared to be trying to get in a healthy walk, or perhaps he was on an errand... he was wearing a pair of silky looking pants that were a deep maroon in color with a gold leaf floral pattern upon them. He was wearing also a black long-sleeved top with wide sleeves and which had also a gold floral pattern upon it. Small flowers, in this case, with not a leaf-like pattern to be seen, unlike with the pants. He was wearing around his neck a pendant shaped like a star with eight arrows, a symbol she had never seen before but which she found highly interesting to notice.
5. The man was not tall, just reaching 5'8 in height. He was of an extremely average build. He had some weight on him, which was what gave Beth the impression he must have been out of shape. Yet, he was
moving with speed, purpose, and without losing his breath. So he was clearly strong and healthy to a bit of a reasonable degree, at least. He had long black hair, but the hair had the quality of doll hair, a rather synthetic look which made Bethany come to the conclusion that the man was wearing a wig. He had a round face, grayish blue eyes, an aquiline nose and a small mouth. He had arched, very feminine shaped eyebrows that looked painted on, the way certain fashion models' eyebrows look. And he had long, very doll-like eyelashes of the sort that most women would kill to be blessed with. The man had a very slight double chin, but his hands were very smooth looking in the way women's hands are, and at one time it was evident his fingers had been more delicate and slender than they were at present due to his weight. This was the first time Bethany has seen this man, who was carrying a purple purse slung around one shoulder. He appeared to be out doing shopping in town. He looked so unusual compared to other men Bethany had seen, and the little girl wondered if perhaps he was even a man at all and not some kind of a woman. She had seen people like that from the neighboring city of Northampton, people who seemed to blend genders in some very unusual and creative ways. Perhaps this man performed as a drag queen on the side, or some sort of entertainer. Her imagination, once again, ran wild. She yelled out to him as she slowed while riding past him: “Hey, mister! Are you a boy or a girl? You look pretty.” And she then realized how awkward what she said had been even as the words left her mouth. “He's going to be mad at me, or think I'm being rude or insulting.” she thought silently as his face turned red from very visible embarrassment after which he replied: “I'm a boy. A pretty boy, I guess you could say.” and his voice as he spoke sounded like a teenager's voice more than an adult man's. She asked him: “How old are you?” and he answered: “I'm thirty-seven.” and she said in reply to that: “I'm ten! My name's Bethany. What's yours?” and he said in answer to her question: “Jeremy, but you can call me Jay for short.” She then had stopped her bicycle entirely and walked it over so she could talk to him for a bit. “You look like one of the people from Northampton.” she said, and then added: “You live in town?” and he said: “Yeah, I do. I take care of my grandmother ever since my mother died and my grandfather died. My brother comes over to visit once in a while, but he doesn't really help, he just takes her money and pretends he's doing her a favor by coming to visit. He's a real jerk! So mostly, I'm the last family member she's got left who she can rely on. She's in and out of the hospital all the time though. Earlier, I had to get her some of her medications from the drug store, and now I'm finishing up some shopping for myself. I got some brand new makeup, actually, and am stopping by Big E's to pick up something for dinner tonight.” Big E's had been the grocery store Jeremy shopped at the most since it was the closest to home for him. Bethany so said: “Boys don't usually wear makeup. You sure you're a boy?” and Jeremy said: “Pretty sure!” and the girl then went on, saying: “So what you thinking of picking up for dinner?” and he stated: “Oh, I might probably just get a ready made meal from the selection they have on offer. They put out some good stuff each day, cooked up right there.” Then he asked her: “So what are you up to, kiddo?” and she said: “I'm just on my way home right now. I'm already late, and if I'm not back soon they're gonna come looking for me and be really mad.” So Jay said to her, reasonably: “That's parents for you!” and she nodded in agreement before saying: “See you around town, Jay!” before riding off. Jeremy so thought to himself: “What a nice, friendly little girl she was! I never got the chance to ask her what her name was though.” which did not sit well with him and made him feel a bit at a disadvantage. But he'd given her the fake name he used when he felt uncomfortable telling strangers he real name, so it put them on somewhat of an even ground in that she didn't know his real name anyway. She reminded him of someone he used to know, someone who had been very dear to him, but he tried to put the memory of that someone out of his mind, since it only caused him pain to think about it too deeply. He was hungry, it was late, and he had to be home to check the phone for any calls from his grandmother's doctor, or the doctor's nurse.
6. Bethany had a bad night that night. Her father beat her for arriving home late, her mother screamed at her and said it was her own fault, and she was sent to bed literally without supper like in all the stories of strict parents who do things like that when their children misbehave. Only... she hadn't misbehaved at all, she just got distracted by a couple of things that caught her attention. She was always like that, ever easily distracted by this or that. Tomorrow, she was going to meet her friend Rachel at the library, just to hang out, before deciding what to get up to next. She fell asleep exhausted, had weird dreams about that unusual man and his strange pendant, and woke up wondering what those dreams actually meant. It was a bit of a rush in the morning as she got into the shower, waited to dry off, styled her hair just right, and then got dressed. She put on a pair of very comfortable red bloomer style shorts, threw on a midriff baring peasant blouse with short puffy sleeves which was cream in color, and slid on some knee-high white socks and a pair of red and white sneakers that always went good with this outfit when she wore it. Breakfast was rushed, and promising her parents she'd be home on time better tonight was a chore in every sense of the word given how angry they were with her last night. But they believed her promise... even though she knew she'd probably just end up breaking it anyway... and she grabbed her purse which she had forgotten to bring with her the day before, and then she scurried out the door before her parents could get a chance to change their minds. She raced for her bicycle and then she was off in the direction of the Emily Williston Memorial public library. Rachel was likely already there, and the day was so nice out, with no clouds in the sky except for a few flat and wispy looking ones. Bethany was feeling happy.
- (The school system simply assumed the parents pulled both kids out of school, to home school them.)
7. Rachel was in the children's department of the library which was the downstairs section. She was just hanging out rather than actually looking at any of the books. She had adult taste in reading, so her fare of choice was upstairs. But Rachel knew that Bethany had the usual childlike taste in reading, being but ten years old as she was, and so the older girl felt obliged to cater to her younger friend's choice when it comes to reading material. She checked her watch, noticed it was still early, and resumed attempting to look busy doing nothing while waiting for her friend. Bethany came bounding down the steps soon and rushed over to Rachel and cried out: “Rachel! Good to see ya.” in a very silly manner that made Rachel chuckle. The older girl was wearing a pair of magenta colored shorts with a black sleeveless top tucked into them. She had a pair of white leggings on beneath her shorts, and her magenta colored jacket was sitting on the table in front of her. Rachel's hair looked a little on the frizzy side today, she thought, but the curls weren't that bad in actuality. Rachel said to Bethany: “I thought your parents were going to just up and ground you, Beth! They're way too strict in some ways, and much too lax in others.” to which it felt obligatory for Bethany to say in reply: “Nah! I've got a silver tongue, made all the usual promises... they fell for it, the suckers.” Rachel shook her had, a serious look on her face, as she said to her friend: “Look, Beth, you can only pull stunts like that for so long. Eventually, they're gonna get pissed enough to step up the punishments, and you already have enough to deal with when it comes to that. So, your dad, he didn't hit you last night when you got home so late?” and Bethany answered: “No, but I had to eat good this morning... no supper.” Rachel crossed her arms and said: “Figures! So, Beth, what made you so late? I called your folks to let them know we're be hanging out today and they told me you were a whole hour late in the end. That's kind of pushing it.” And Bethany told Rachel about her stop by the pond and her conversation with that man. Rachel then looked concerned and said: “So, you actually... you stopped to talk to some strange man you don't even know? That's crazy! What if he was a wacko or a serial killer or some pervert?” And Bethany told the older girl: “But he was nice! He said he's taking care of his sick grandmother and was out buying her medicine.” Rachel then smiled and nodded her head as she agreed: “Okay, so... not a creep then. That's good at least! But he sounds really unusual.” Then, Rachel led Bethany outside and said to her: “Let's see if we can spot him again! Together.” and Bethany said: “He was out kind of late though.” to which Rachel responded: “Hey, we've got all day!”
8. Jeremy had slept in a bit, and woke up to get his grandmother started on her morning medications... it was something he'd dreaded since she was always constantly so nasty to him and never listened to her doctor's instructions at all. Everyone in town knew her as the crazy old woman who lived in the purple house, and it was a source of deep embarrassment for Jeremy, and part of the reason he keep seeking to distance himself from anything to do with her, including the family name. He rarely if ever gave his last name to people, and it had to do with how much he felt the family's reputation had been ruined over the years by people like his grandparents and their careless and ridiculous behavior. And they had ever had the nerve to call him the embarrassment! At least he was well liked in town by the one or two most true friends he had there. If anything people felt sorry for him with everything he had to deal with at home. Today, he put on a pair of blue rayon harem style pants, very silky and comfortable... and he had on top a long blue silk blouse with wide elbow-length sleeves and which had on it a Japanese art style pattern. He decided not to bother with the wig today, and had shaved his head and eyebrows as per usual just the night before. He was not going to bother with makeup today either. He was still indecisive about if he was going to attempt to live as a woman or remain presenting himself as androgynous. He had been having bad luck trying to find women to date online, and he realized he spent an incredible amount of time online as it was between his art projects, his writings, and his dabbling with video game design in an amateur capacity. He had never made a single penny on anything he'd ever attempted, nor did he in truth wish to. He was content with making people happy, and money didn't factor into that. At present, he was needed at home almost full time, and he kept figuring that once he found someone, preferably someone very understanding, that then he could figure out a way to turn things around and make his life go in the direction he wanted it to go in. He had been working on writing his book for the past decade, and it was a year or two away from being finished. He planned to publish it once it was complete, and hoped that would take care of his financial worries. In the meantime he told people he was a freelance artist who worked on private commissions for people. In a way, it wasn't entirely a lie even if it was far from the actual truth. He did create artwork he uploaded to DeviantArt online, and sometimes people did ask him to create certain works with certain themes. So it was a white lie that did no one any harm. Breakfast was brief, and it was about two o'clock in the afternoon by the time he was ready for the day. Okay, maybe he had slept in a little more than just a bit! He grabbed his purse, checked the answering machine after his grandmother was settled in watching television in the living room, and then headed out to town after telling her he would be back later, in time for supper. He had his cell phone with him, just in case the old woman needed anything, or in case her doctor needed to get a hold of him. So, he was soon on his way to town and delighted that his brother had not disgraced the house with his rather annoying presence thus far today. Back when he used to do mentoring for the children at the library, it was usually around this time he'd head up there... he'd wait until they got out of school, waited for the regulars to arrive at the library, and then he'd begin the usual routine of figuring out which ones needed help with their homework, school projects, or just about anything else. He had a mind to stop by there for a brief look-in to see if anything had changed since he'd last been there. It was a place he felt a lot of nostalgia for, and he wondered if anyone he used to know was even still there anymore. Things changed very fast during the past decade, in that sleepy town which was now classified as a small city. It was a place where local artists were coming in and changing things for the better, and Jeremy had long ago ceased to keep up with the changes. His mind, and often his heart, was trapped in the past and in golden memories of happier times. Times when he had less responsibilities, less worries and fears, and less of a feeling of his life going downhill fast. “If I could just turn back the clock.” he said sometimes, but when would he turn it back to, if he could! His life has never been perfect, never been even close to good. It had always been a struggle, it seemed, and these days he felt as if he was treading water while caught in an increasingly turbulent sea. If only he could reach land! If only he could find his feet on solid ground.
9. After a while of just searching for that strange man, the two girls rode back to the library and decided to have a look in the adult section upstairs to see if any grown-up books struck their fancy. Bethany was of a mind to broaden her reading horizons, and Rachel sought to accommodate her friend's desire. That was around three in the afternoon, and all of a sudden Bethany pointed toward the door and said: “Look that's him!” and Rachel said: “He doesn't have long hair.” but Beth explained: “No, silly! I told you, his hair looked like it was fake... like a wig. But that's his face, and see? He's wearing that star pendant just like yesterday.” Bethany rushed over to the man, Rachel behind her, and she asked: “Hey! Are you the guy I talked to in town yesterday, the guy who takes care of his grandmother?” and the man smiled and said to her: “I remember you! You were late getting home.” and he avoided eye contact with Rachel as he spoke only to Beth. Rachel then said: “My name's Rachel! This is my best friend, Bethany.” The man then did a short, polite, semi-bow and said to them: “My name's Jeremy. Just call me Jay! I was, to be honest, wondering what Bethany's name was. I just called her 'kiddo'.” Beth then so asked of him: “So, what are you up to here?” and he explained to her: “I used to do mentoring here for the kids, and I did artwork for them that I sometimes gave them as gifts, among other things. I just wanted to stop in and see how much things have changed, if anything. I'll probably have to get a new library card sometime, mine's ridiculously out of date.” Rachel said: “Mentoring is a nice thing to do! Did you do it for pay, or volunteer?” To which Jay made explicitly clear: “I never asked for a single penny. Everything I did, or do, for people I do for free, for the love of it. It wouldn't be right to ask for money from kids' families... and most people who do legitimate mentoring are volunteer, like I was. Same reason I take care of my grandmother, it's the right thing to do.” Beth said: “Would you like to hang out with us? You seem cool, and nice, and maybe you could show us some of your art.” to which he explained: “Well, I did bring my binder and my pen with me today.” and he indicated the black binder filled with plain white copy paper that he held in his right hand. “So I could draw some stuff for you, and you could tell me how it looks, what you think of it.” And Rachel said: “That sounds nice! Let's pick a table in back, over there.” and they walked over to an empty table and chairs in between a space in the rows of the adult section of the library, one that was more to the back and appropriately in the art and cooking section. Jay sketched the two girls faces, idealizing their features quite a bit admittedly, but still making them recognizable, and he drew little hearts and flowers and stars around them. He used a black art pen to do it, and when it was finished he showed it to the two girls and asked: “Be brutally honest with me... how is it?” and so, Bethany's eyes lit up as she smiled and said: “That's so cool! It looks just like me.” and Rachel said: “I knew my hair looked frizzy today... but yeah, Jay, that looks nice. Spot on!” And then Jay told them that there used to be two girls who were regulars of his, so this brought back good memories for him of all those days when they brightened his life. Beth said: “You're so sweet!” Rachel said: “So, how long did you used to mentor for? I mean, what were your hours I guess.” And Jay stated: “I'd get here around the time I got here today, and I'd usually stay with the kids until six o'clock when the library closes. In the case of the two girls I've mentioned, I hung out with one of them until her parents came to pick her up. She was like a daughter to me, as well as a best friend. I miss her a lot sometimes. And Beth asked: “So only sometimes?” and Jay corrected: “Maybe all the time.” and he looked a bit said, as if he was just about to cry, but he smiled in a very forced way and said to Bethany: “Well, the past is in the past, and right now we're hanging out together and I prefer to focus on the present in any case.” Rachel said to him: “That's sensible. So Beth said you're in your thirties? She's ten, and me I'm twelve. Normally, we don't talk to strangers, but a mentor is okay because that's like a teacher and teachers are cool. Usually.” to which Beth said: “That's an awful comparison! Teachers suck.” which made Jay giggle and admit: “Yes! Like she said. Teachers do suck, quite a bit actually. No, I'm more like a cool teacher, not like one of the ones you'd hate the guts of.” Rachel then asked: “So what happened to your eyebrows? I mean, I hope I don't sound rude but you do look very unusual.” And that made Jay chuckle, if only just a little.
10. He said to her in honest answer: “I lost them, along with my hair, back in 2005, the year my mother died. I don't know if it was from nerves, or a condition of some kind I never knew I had, but my hair got to a point where I felt my scalp burning big time and then the hair all just started falling out in bloody clumps, it was nasty and really painful. I've had to shave my head and eyebrows completely ever since.” And Beth said: “That sounds gross! And really awful.” to which Rachel said: “I've heard of conditions like that. Honestly, I'm glad you explained that... because I just assumed you had cancer, or something.” Then, Jay said, with a sigh of relief: “No, thankfully nothing of the sort. I'd be dead by now, if that had been the case, all that many years ago.” Jay then asked the two girls: “So, do you two come here a lot? If so, I might stop by more often so we can hang out.” to which Rachel said: “Sometimes! With school coming up next month, we'll probably be stopping by from time to time for books or to use the library's computers to look stuff.” And Beth, distracted for a moment by Jay's pendant asked him, cutting in on her sister's conversation with him: “Jay! What's that pendant mean?” and he clasped it in his hand and asked: “This? Well, it's called the Arrows of Chaos, and it symbolizes the randomness of creativity. In this case, chaos doesn't mean anarchy or anything bad. It just stands for creativity, and being an artist I always felt drawn to this symbol because of that meaning it has. It has other meanings besides, but that is the one that really draws me to it.” Rachel asked: “So you're an artist too?” and he elaborated with his usual embellishment by saying: “I do artwork for private individuals who pay me to create drawings or paintings for them. I also publish my works online, too.” And he could tell the two girls found that to be very impressive. Rachel said: “Yeah, this town's been getting a lot of artists moving in lately. You lived here your whole life, or are you one of the newcomers?” and Jay clarified: “I've lived here mostly for my whole life. Ever since I was five years old. I used to hate it here, but it's grown on me in recent years and I can't imagine living anywhere else to be honest. This library has changed a bit since I was here... back in 2004, I'd say... I don't really recognize any of these people here now. It's a whole new crowd, by the look of it. I'd have a hard time getting used to that if I was here as much as I used to be.” At which Rachel smiled and said: “I guess a lot can change in seven years.” Rachel and Bethany then said to the kind man who was now their new friend, or rather Rachel spoke for both of the two girls: “So, I'm just sort of thinking, deciding what I think we should do, and maybe we could go for a walk, the three of us. Like, leave our bikes here and just walk down Park Street a bit. It's a nice day for it, and there's no real sense cooping ourselves up in here for the rest of the day.” Jay then asked: “The three of us?” and the young girl nodded her head and exclaimed: “Sure! Why not? Beth says you look like you like to walk, and we do too so it'd be a cool way to get to know you better.” Jay liked the sound of that, and felt it was only good form to please the kids and be nice, so he agreed to go for a walk with them. Park Street had always been one of the longest streets in town, and honestly Jay had nothing better to do right at this point in time anyway. “I'm in! Let's go.” he said eagerly, a friendly smile on his face. They got up from the table, and binder in hand Jay went with the two girls on their walk. It was beautiful outside, not too hot for late August, and there was only a few clouds in the sky and thankfully no chance of rain to ruin things. He'd walked down Park street many times to head towards his neighborhood from town, always on days when he had time to waste and just felt like taking his time getting home. This was the first time in a long time that he wouldn't be walking that long stretch of road alone, and it felt good to him. A respite from what felt like a long stretch of loneliness and a ravenous need for a bit of pleasant company. He wondered if this friendship would become as meaningful as it had been with those girls he had told his two new companions about. But then he brought his mind back to the present, steering it as far as possible from the pains of the past and all the torments from the past that so often kept him up late into the past midnight hours, causing him nightmares that made him wake up screaming. Yes, he was well acquainted with chaos in all its' forms, both the creative and the destructive, and he preferred to focus only on the creative. The world had changed, for him, and yet some things felt highly familiar.
11. One year later, in early October, Rachel... who was now thirteen years old... had begun to notice the strange behavior that her best friend Bethany was beginning to exhibit. The little girl was eleven, and she almost never wanted to play anymore. She was so quiet that she was nearly nonverbal, and there it seemed where signs of an onset of some form of mental illness that Rachel found quite alarming. Beth's parents were at a loss to explain these oddities, and Beth's therapist believes that her schizophrenia was worsening over time. When Bethany did talk, all she talked about were voices she heard, and terrifying hallucinations that she refused to elaborate upon. Something had happened to her, something horrible... which finally snapped her young mind and drove it fully into the oncoming jaws of madness. Rachel came over to Beth's home to visit her one day, and found her sitting naked in her room and drawing a series of gruesome scenes with stick figures. The style was childish, but the blood and horror that was depicted in the drawings were evident. One scene, over and over again, prevailed... a scene of a stick figure of a little girl whose hair Bethany colored to look like her own... who was laying upon a bed in some room while the stick figure of a man was just on top of her. Rachel had a good idea what that was supposed to represent, and the thought disgusted and frightened her. “Beth, it's early autumn, you need to put some clothes on.” the older girl suggested. Beth's eyes were wide and wild, her mouth curled in a wide, crazy grin as she said: “I know! I know. But he'll just take them off of me again. And hurt me.” to which Rachel said: “Who? What happened to you, Beth! Last year everything was fine, we were happy and our new friend was cool and we went on walks and hung out together lots and lots. But then, right after you and him started to seem like you were really bonded you didn't want to see Jay anymore and then you stopped wanting see me either. I don't understand.” and then Beth stood straight up, tore up all her drawings angrily with tears in her eyes, and said: “I know! I know! I'm a bad, dirty girl. I know, and I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.” Rachel then grabbed Beth's shoulders and said sternly: “No! I mean it! No, you are not a bad girl, or a dirty girl, or anything else. You hear me? You're my best friend and me and your parents and your therapist are all scared and worried about you. Those drawings that you tore up, and what you said about someone taking off your clothes and hurting you... did someone do that to you... was it your dad? If it was, this time I don't care... he's going to prison.” Beth said: “No, it wasn't daddy, it wasn't daddy, and I can't tell, I can't ever tell, I promised I'd keep it a secret! I can't break my promise, he said it would be bad if I broke it, that he'd hurt you too if I did.” Rachel was, at that point, screaming inside. She knew someone had raped her best friend, stolen her sanity along with her innocence, and she was burning with rage over it. She had to find out who it was, when and how it happened. “Beth, please... put some clothes on.” and then Bethany put on a one piece baggy jumpsuit from her closet which was a harem style sleeveless jumpsuit that almost resembled a clown costume but which wasn't. She slid on her underwear beforehand, and once she was dressed fully, she asked her older friend: “Do I look pretty, Rachel? Would he think I look pretty, do you think?” and Rachel asked her who she was referring to. Beth replied: “He comes to me in my dreams, dressed like a clown, and he tells me I need to be a good little girl and keep our little secret.” Rachel asked her: “Who? And what secret are you talking about! Is it the man who took your clothes off and hurt you?” Beth nodded, and said: “He's not human, Rachel. I thought he was, but he's not! He's something scary, and now I'm going to become something scary too.” As she said that, the younger girl's eyes began to glow with a peculiar golden sheen of light that passed over them momentarily. Rachel thought it was a trick of the light, but then the light came upon Beth's eyes again and the little girl began to giggle manically with her mouth twisted into a wide grin that was almost unnatural and the sort of grin that could be called insane. Once that happened, Beth walked over to her makeup box and began to paint her face to look like a clown... only without a red nose or anything silly like that. It was more a dark, goth style, and when Beth did get finished with that... she put her hair into a side ponytail and said to her best friend: “Rachel, be honest with me! Do I look pretty... like this?” and Rachel, tears in her eyes, said: “Sure, Beth! Really pretty.”
12. Rachel went to the library by herself that day, headed to the children's section, and there she tried to take her mind off of Beth's insanity and the evidence that so pointed to a brutal rape as having been the cause of it. Rachel was wearing that outfit she had on when she and Bethany first met Jay... during the previous year, in August. It felt strange to be back in the library, one year later, dressed like this, and yet without either of her friends present. She walked over to the rows of books, tried to pick something out to read, anything light and childish and silly to take her mind off of her troubles. Then, she saw Jay as he was walking down the stairs into the children's department. She smiled, her face bright as she waved and said to him: “Hey, Jay! Over here.” and the man walked over to her. He looked careworn, as if he had all the problems of the entire world on his shoulders, and his face looked sad. His head was shaved as usual, and as usual so were his eyebrows. He was wearing a pair of long baggy looking forest green women's dress pants, tied at the waist with a black cloth belt. And over that, he had on a blue sweater with puffy looking sleeves. He was dressed for the autumn season, and he was wearing some elaborate looking style of makeup which would not have been all that glaring except for the fact that he perhaps had on a little too much blush at the cheeks and a bit too colorful a style for his eye makeup. It looked almost clown-like in some ways, but more goth. He had thick black eyeliner and black eye shadow on his eyelids, in stark contrast to the olive green upper shadowing above the lids, and the orange coloring above that. It was a very autumn look, but a colorful one, as stated previously. The black mascara that he had on brought out the long length of his eyelashes to almost doll-like proportions. He had on some blood red lipstick that completed his look, and some orange glitter over the orange section of his eye makeup. It was reminiscent of something either a dancer or a drag queen would do for makeup. That, or a prostitute trying to look “exotic” for her client. Rachel thought it was eccentric, but she'd seen him in looks like this before so it did not bother her overtly. She said to him as he approached: “Hey there!” to which he answered: “Hey, Rachel! Where's Bethany? Last time we got together, she seemed really kind of down to me. Is she doing okay?” And Rachel said: “I don't wanna talk about it here. Let's go for a walk, we can talk about it easier with no one to overhear us.” But Jay looked worried. He asked in an insistent way: “Why? What's happened to Beth?” but Rachel didn't say a word until they were halfway down Park Street, passing the grounds of the Williston Northampton School, which was basically some kind of a boarding school for the rich kids in town. It was the main feature of the far end of Park Street. Then, when they got to that point, Rachel said to Jay: “Jay, I think Beth was raped. And it's driven her crazy. She keeps making drawings about it and ripping them up, and she told me some guy took all her clothes off and... he hurt her, as she worded it. I had all I could do to get her to put her clothes on, and when she did, she decided to try and make herself look like a clown. Almost as if she was emulating a style like you have.” Jay then cleared his throat and said: “Well, she and I were very close before what happened... happened. She kind of was starting to look up to me in a lot of ways.” Rachel said: “Yeah I know, that's what concerns me so much. I mean, we were with her more than her own parents were, and whenever I couldn't be there for her you were. You two were practically inseparable after a while! I just can't figure out when, where, or how some creep could've even had the time to... grab her. Also, she has these freaky nightmares about some guy dressed like a clown who comes to her and tells her not to talk about whatever the hell it is that happened to her. But it's not like she ever went to a circus or a place I could see a clown being at. But it's beginning to look like she was raped by... a clown.” Jay said, in an attempt at lightening the mood with some humor: “A clown? This... it's like a Stephen King story at this point, only a whole lot worse because this is real.” And Rachel nodded her head and admitted: “It is a lot like a horror story, and that's what's scaring me. It doesn't make any sense!” But then Rachel said: “Oh my God! Wait a minute... a clown. No, that's not possible. Forget I even thought that for a second.” and Jay asked: “Thought what, Rachel?” to which she answered: “Well, the closest person I know of who looks kind of clown-like at times is you, with your makeup and baggy colorful clothes, and stuff.”
13. Jay then asked her: “So, you think I did it?” to which she answered: “No! Of course not, like I said don't even worry about it, it was just a coincidence I happened to notice is all.” And then Rachel asked: “Hey, Jay, can I crash at your place for an hour or two? I didn't get much sleep last night, I just kept on worrying about Beth and it kept me up until I could visit her this morning. And now, after all the drama that caused, I just need some good sleep and we're closer to your neighborhood right now than mine. If that's okay with you, I mean.” To which Jay answered: “Sure, why not! My grandmother had to go to the hospital again, so right now I have the whole place to myself. I'd love the company, actually, and it would be cool for you to finally get to see where I live. Beth's been there before, but you haven't.” and at that point, had she been smarter Rachel would have realized the terrifying truth. But she was tried... and needed someone she could so trust with what she knew had happened to Bethany. Jay was the one friend they both had in common, the one adult they felt they could trust more than their own parents. It was what made this tragedy so much crueler and more twisted. It was a purple house in the middle of Winter Street, which was just down Ward Ave, which cut left off the section of Park Street just past the end of the aforementioned school's grounds. There were tall pine trees out front, and the back yard was overgrown. The house looked to be in a state of decline, its' stucco walls cracked in places. It was, in short, a wreck of a place on the outside. Inside, it was normal looking if a bit dark due to the windows being smaller than they should have been. The lights were on, but it still was dimmer than it should've been. Jay explained: “So up the steps off the driveway is the back porch, right there. And the kitchen is right inside.” They went inside the house, and Jay showed her each room. “The first room is a den, it contains some of my books, comics, dolls, board games, and collectibles. The second room down the hallway right there, that's my room. Across from that is the bathroom, down a ways is the living room and my grandmother's room is off of that, but it's cluttered to kingdom come. The only comfortable bed is in my room.” Rachel said: “I'll take it!” and Jay led her into his bedroom and closed the door right behind them as they went inside. The room was filled with more bookshelves, stuffed animals, dolls, and collectibles. A computer desk was on one wall, the bed was across from it on the other wall, and a Wiccan shrine, or at least what seemed to be one, dominated the wall on the far side of the room from the door. Another door just led into a closet. Rachel laid down on the bed, stretched out, and fell fast asleep. When she woke up, it was two hours later and Jay was laying next to her, his fingers caressing her hair as he said to her softly: “Wake up, princess! Or would you like a magic kiss?” to which she... thinking he was just being silly... puckered her lips. He suddenly kissed her, a very passionate kiss too, and she gasped as her eyes went wide. She pulled back from the kiss... and said: “Jay! What the heck are you doing... do I look like a Disney princess to you?” to which he answered: “No, you're prettier by a big margin. Don't worry, I washed off my makeup for now.” And she realized he was caressing her in very inappropriate ways. But part of her found him attractive, and she didn't want to make him upset so she said to him: “So, you're playing the role of the handsome prince?” to which Jay said: “I prefer the term pretty to handsome, but I don't mind the role of the prince if you don't mind being the princess.” It was clear to her by his words that he thought of this as some kind of fairy tale come true. She said then to him: “So, did you play Disney princess and prince with Beth too, Jay?” and he asked her what she meant by that. She knew he was the one who had raped Bethany, and this to her was the confirmation of his true twisted nature. She said to him: “You know what I mean.” She hoped she could get him to... in some way... admit to it. He said to her: “Bethany's not here right now, but you are.” and the way that he said that, in such a soft tone of voice, an almost soothing one, sent chills down her spine. She caressed the side of his face, tried to make him think she was interested in him in this way, as she said: “You're right, she's not here. So... what have you got in mind? Something to take our minds off of her, I hope.” and he kissed her again, and this time she returned his kiss with equal zeal. She hated doing this, and if she was correct in her suspicions this man was a monster. But, she needed to search for any advantage.
14. That night, as she showered back at her home... Rachel tried to tell herself, that she could keep Jay's secret, that she could be what he wanted and needed her to be. She was hesitant at first, unwilling even, but something changed after they made love. She felt different. She never told him about the glow that she saw in Bethany's eyes, but she hadn't needed to. That glow was now in hers as well. He had opened her eyes to a different reality, just as he had with Beth, and now the two girls were bound to keep ever and always his secrets. Terrible, eldritch secrets! He wasn't human like they both had thought he was... but he wasn't exactly a monster, either. He was something indescribable and terrible and horrifying, but she could not refuse him. Any more than Bethany could. No one would ever discover the truth in regard to what happened to Beth... everyone just figured that she was crazy is all... and she'd hidden the sexual and supernatural aspects of her assault from everybody to such an extent that even if they suspected she had been raped they would have chalked it up to an imagined scenario born of deep psychosis. She had never been seen by a doctor to confirm whether she was still a virgin or not anymore. But she was not, and not just physically. Her mind was defiled as well. And now, Rachel was becoming like her, only in the older girl's case she was more in control of herself, more able to accept the changes she felt in her mind and body. The hour of her defilement at Jeremy's hands was now, to Rachel, like unto the sort of moment of rebirth that could be seen as akin to a phoenix rising from its' own funeral pyre. The old her was ashes now, and what had replaced it there was no name for. “No, he wasn't human after all.” she'd kept on muttering to herself while in the shower, adding: “But then again, I have no room to talk. Now that I'm not human anymore either.” What broke Bethany only strengthened Rachel, and both girls had become bound to the will of the demonic entity that existed within the seemingly human form of Jay. After her shower, Rachel searched her closet for anything even remotely resembling clown attire. She found a pair of baggy pants that looked pretty close to either harem style pants or clown pants, and she put them on, tying the drawstrings. The pants where black with white polka dots, and they matched a blouse she had with short but very puffy sleeves, which had the identical pattern on it. She had put on the blouse first, and tucked it into the pants before tying them. She pulled her hair into two rather cute twin ponytails, and then she set about working on her makeup. She wanted it to look perfect, for him! Halloween was a bit different that year. Jay was not alone when he had visited his mother's grave at the cemetery. The two girls were with him, both dressed in their clown attire. “So, who's up for a spot of trick or treating tonight?” he asked them, and they said in unison: “We are, master!” and he knew that in that moment they were bound to him forever. The little one, Bethany, was always a bit nervous when they got up to mischief like this, but she would not... could not... refuse him. The older one, Rachel, in every way was almost his equal when it came to demented depravity. The darkness in her, called forth from out of Hell itself, was stronger than it was in Beth. She had killed a homeless man in Northampton for him, and Beth had helped her dispose of the body so no one would ever find it. And that was how it was that the two little girls got a taste for blood and for carnage. Their first sacrifice to the unholy god that masqueraded inside the flesh of Jeremy's seemingly mortal form. It was a great warm-up before the night of Halloween, the peak of the Samhain season. Now, tonight, the girls' respective sets of parents thought they were out just doing the usual trick or treat business with their adult mentor friend, Jay, and they always were happy to leave them in his most responsible care. They would never have believed the truth, if someone had even told them it outright. For... the demon within Jay's body... was powerful and deceptive in ways both subtle and perverse. He was dressed in colorful harem style pants, with a very silky looking blouse with long billowing sleeves. His face was painted like a clown's, but without a red nose and with distinctly goth styling. He had a carving knife in his carrying bag, and other tools. The girls brought tools of their own in their purses. “Time to bring the fear back into the Samhain season!” he proclaimed, with a chuckle, as his face broke into a terrifying grin. A new girl, Sarah, joined them.
- (Rachel and Bethany went missing, in early 2013... it was never reported, and their fate is unknown.)
Published 13th Dec 2024
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