deepundergroundpoetry.com
Erosion of Time
Time has been unforgiving
to my mortal wounds.
My soul lay exposed
beneath a bone white moon.
Contemplation at the day's end.
Is time a formidable opponent
or a faithful friend?
When will it be our time?
Will a ladder to eternity
be there to climb?
Who will read my final rhyme?
We waste our days,
in a grossly over thought maze.
You may cherish a memory
Were you even present or
did your attention flee?
We are told the now
is where happiness resides
The abysmal past
is our usual alibi.
In relentless pursuit
of the elusive why.
Be present before you erode
and die.
to my mortal wounds.
My soul lay exposed
beneath a bone white moon.
Contemplation at the day's end.
Is time a formidable opponent
or a faithful friend?
When will it be our time?
Will a ladder to eternity
be there to climb?
Who will read my final rhyme?
We waste our days,
in a grossly over thought maze.
You may cherish a memory
Were you even present or
did your attention flee?
We are told the now
is where happiness resides
The abysmal past
is our usual alibi.
In relentless pursuit
of the elusive why.
Be present before you erode
and die.
Author's Note
The photo is AI. But the poetry is all mine.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 12
reading list entries 4
comments 23
reads 150
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 00:49am
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 00:55am
It does for me too, but it's hard to always implement.
But isn't the present all we actually have?
Thx for checking out and commenting.
Enjoy your night.
But isn't the present all we actually have?
Thx for checking out and commenting.
Enjoy your night.
Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 1:02am
As an existentialist, I'm firmly in the camp convinced that the present is all we have, which makes it that much more important that we don't mess each other up. 💚
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 1:06am
Exactly. No guarantee the sun will rise or you will wake up alive.
I'm spiritual, but I'm also very into existentialism.
Thank you for reading and your response.
I'm spiritual, but I'm also very into existentialism.
Thank you for reading and your response.
Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 3:41am
Powerful write, Debbie. I felt this ink. As I get older I become more aware of my mortality. It's natural I know, but it enters my brain a little more each day. Really liked this. Appreciate you.
DL
DL
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 5:10am
Thank you. I know what you mean, I feel the same.
Staying present is a difficult task too, for me
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate you!
Staying present is a difficult task too, for me
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate you!
Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 10:21am
Time is our enemy. We have to accept the fact that were all going to die sooner or later.
A beautiful & honest poem. Amazing as always. You always draw me in, every single time.
A beautiful & honest poem. Amazing as always. You always draw me in, every single time.
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 1:47pm
I agree with your thoughts. Thank you very much, I'm happy you are drawn in.
That's a high compliment, thank you!
That's a high compliment, thank you!
Re. Erosion of Time
15th Nov 2024 1:38pm
I felt this in ways I can’t even describe.
Bowing to you, girl.
This is my favorite poem of yours now💕
Bowing to you, girl.
This is my favorite poem of yours now💕
1
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
Wow, that is so nice of you to say. I feel completely humbled.
I'm happy it resonated!
THANK YOU 💜
I'm happy it resonated!
THANK YOU 💜
Re. Erosion of Time
16th Nov 2024 2:28am
This one makes me think a bit. I like how you used reference to past, present, and future at the end, as well as some of the vivid imagery in definition in the earlier parts. "Bone white moon" is an especially artistic metaphor, in how you built up to it asking the question of the soul. Some dual principle and moral inquisition are there as well - again, makes me think/wonder. Overall, great job. I enjoyed reading it. Thanks for sharing!
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
16th Nov 2024 6:10pm
So glad you enjoyed it. And thanks for the nice commentary.
I like how this one came out.
I like how this one came out.
Re. Erosion of Time
16th Nov 2024 11:46am
Exactly that: be present. The older I get the more I try to live in the moment, but mostly: be aware.
AI or not: it's an awesome photo and it pairs beautifully with your write.
AI or not: it's an awesome photo and it pairs beautifully with your write.
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
16th Nov 2024 6:16pm
I agree, be aware of the moment you are in. I struggle with anxiety,
so it's not always easy to be present. But the past is over, the future hasn't happened.
No guarantee it will. If you can stay present it makes life easier & more enjoyable.
Thank you so much for the nice comments!
so it's not always easy to be present. But the past is over, the future hasn't happened.
No guarantee it will. If you can stay present it makes life easier & more enjoyable.
Thank you so much for the nice comments!
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
17th Nov 2024 00:59am
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
17th Nov 2024 1:02am
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
17th Nov 2024 3:03am
Re. Erosion of Time
27th Nov 2024 2:57am
"Bone white moon" - excellent. It does seem like a talon at times. Wounding us.
Your write is exquisite. Excellent phrasing and an awesome message delivered.
Your write is exquisite. Excellent phrasing and an awesome message delivered.
0
Re: Re. Erosion of Time
27th Nov 2024 3:11am
Impressive
18th Dec 2024 2:19am
This is a nicely flowing piece of work. My immediate thought, out loud even, was..wow, that was fuc***g great. It is very well done.
lisa777
lisa777
0
Re: Impressive
20th Dec 2024 00:32am