to be

laxidasical genius regretting my life
burning in the cold affection
urgent need is seen but not heard
music holds me up most days
 
tic tock have I accomplished anything?
Hope is always proven wrong
still, I persevere that must count as something
 
sanctioned insanity I blurred the lines
The problem is I stopped watching and listening long ago
unit finally people could be talking but it made no sense
all I could hear was blah, blah
 
When that didn't work after a while body language proved to be too honest
while guile flooded me like an eruption of firey lies that only burn
and ignite my wick
 
it is sordid and cruel
seen as an ice man what an ego you have
there is nothing human or humble about you
resist the urge and stare him in the face
 
regret the shimmering mirage  
that kept you marching through a desert
there was no oasis but that's what you  
always saw when you looked into his eyes
expectations were deep but I knew better
 
no matter if he pulled or I did
my soul would bleed for a long time
amorous lothario of my mind
I wouldn't choose again I have a way about me
 
insisting it's okay ring, ring I got a call
it's your curse to love forever
pain is deranged indignant that I was denied
a dark portal swirls I'm being carried away
my siblings their eyes burning with tears
and a smug look on their faces
don't expect something mortal to last forever