JC enjoys gardening

Ever since my accident
I had Jesus Christ (JC) become my Gardner
he's a slaphappy messiah
all he wants in life is kool-aid, scratch-offs and cigarettes
oh and he enjoys calling up Lucifer (Satan) to meet him at the bowling alley
the priests throughout the neighborhood dislike him
probably because he don't follow all the rules and guidelines,
that are scripted in that fictional book called the Bible
none of the nuns don't like his message (nuns have no fun)
those wrinkled up penguins
flock to my home to get a glimpse of him
their turned on by his looks & sex appeal
one of the younger nuns who is close to 30 years old came over to talk to him one day
she told JC that she overheard the archbishop planning to have you murdered
JC figured this day was eventually going to come
she asked him on why his beliefs differ from what the bible says
he told her as a matter of fact that book is a bunch of fairy tales that have nothing to do with me
the Bible is to scare people, to make them fear life
if they don't follow, they'll end up in hell
he went on by saying he's great friends with Lucifer
we hang out together, get high, gamble and chase woman
how people look at Lucifer and the way he lives is the way everyone should live
"Hell, I live like that", said, JC
the nun was shocked but at the same time turned on
she looked at him with lust and desire
JC took her hand,
went towards the garden shed and fucked her brains out
JC deflowered this young nun
afterwards he said, "Don't go back to the church"
there all liars
she understood and never went back
A few weeks later I get wind that JC, Lucifer & this young woman (formally the nun)
are going to set fire to every church in the neighborhood
they want the archbishop dead
one night they went to his home,
gagged him, clubbed him and threw him in the back of his van
JC has a 1969 Volkswagen bus. A groovy vehicle that is red and white
has a bumpersticker on his van that says "Make Love Not War like JC would do"
they bought this guy back to my place
I was like, "JC YOU CAN'T DO THIS HERE!"
JC said, "Well yeah I could",
he proceeded to take this archbishop apart,
eventually placing him on a makeshift cross JC put together in my backyard
he then torched him on the cross
I immediately got my garden hose and put out the fire
the archbishop was roasted & dead
luckily no one came around and reported me or called the police
JC, Lucifer & the woman started packing the bus with rope, gasoline and other accessories
they had an 8-track system,
blasting Black Widow's Sacrifice album
as they headed up the road to the 1st church,
I got into my car and followed them
I came to a realization that what they were doing was for the good of society and humanity
I turned my head, nodded to them,
and went back home.