deepundergroundpoetry.com
Beatnik Bugmen
And
the rest of us measure time’s
tentative
tick in workweeks.
Minutes, hours, long–
months,
years
short.
Dry up palms coated with caked old grease
as the
righteously
fucked file down
easy street to
Rip the
nails off the coke fiends and
Break the
thumbs of the bassists and
Deck those singers in their throats.
The kids are annoying;
swat their ice cream cones.
Shirt-cock it to your dad’s funeral
Piss in the fountain at the Louvre—
(so much for victory in the halls power built).
the rest of us measure time’s
tentative
tick in workweeks.
Minutes, hours, long–
months,
years
short.
Dry up palms coated with caked old grease
as the
righteously
fucked file down
easy street to
Rip the
nails off the coke fiends and
Break the
thumbs of the bassists and
Deck those singers in their throats.
The kids are annoying;
swat their ice cream cones.
Shirt-cock it to your dad’s funeral
Piss in the fountain at the Louvre—
(so much for victory in the halls power built).
Published 18th Jun 2024
| Edited 19th Jun 2024
Author's Note
Something of a character poem, I suppose.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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comments 2
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
19th Jun 2024 1:21am
Ok, I’m a fan of yours and this missed the cohesion of past writes.
The rage and spit-in-your-face vibe was there, and you had some magnetic lines
This? Balls. Deep. Good.
I like the way Rip can play a little double meaning for the dollar as RIP in that context.
righteously
fucked file down
easy street to
Rip the
nails off the coke fiends and
I really liked the beginning.
I really liked the end.
I have a little disconnect so I think I’d like to see a little middle? Could just be me.
Ps…
Typo?
Dry doesn’t match the verb tenses
Louvre is caps
Overall good piece. I really do dig your images.
The rage and spit-in-your-face vibe was there, and you had some magnetic lines
This? Balls. Deep. Good.
I like the way Rip can play a little double meaning for the dollar as RIP in that context.
righteously
fucked file down
easy street to
Rip the
nails off the coke fiends and
I really liked the beginning.
I really liked the end.
I have a little disconnect so I think I’d like to see a little middle? Could just be me.
Ps…
Typo?
Dry doesn’t match the verb tenses
Louvre is caps
Overall good piece. I really do dig your images.
Thank you, it's a single, standalone work and thus isn't related to any of my collections (of which the poems I've published here can be otherwise subdivided between). I fixed the caps thing; I'll leave the rest be, it may not be semantically correct but it remains true to my initial thoughts (I don't want that to come off as dickhead-adjacent though, I really appreciate the engagement Betty).
-Regards, Alois
-Regards, Alois
