deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hole
I’m not sure what I was thinking
as she stung my nose with alcohol
placed on that blue clamp
found my perfect sweet spot
though I was just relieved to know
part of me had one amongst
my external prickle
my girl laid her palm on my hand
as a needle went through
I sat amazed that five years
of questioning this piercing
was reduced to no tears
no flinching
just a quick pinch and it was done
while I glanced in a mirror
to the gnarly sight of a canula
hanging from my freshly
jabbed septum, heart so loud
you could hear it in the street.
In hospital, needles where items
of pure fear, robbing my blood,
spearing my spine, collecting
fluids and test results daily
punctuating torment
with purple exclamation marks.
I thought over it all as I sat
on a leather bed, cold metal
hanging from my face
knowing that this one meant more
knowing I’d conquered something
that I am a lame creature existing
in a curious world of agony.
This was me, all me
taking control of the misery that binds
a court jester before a king of pain
this was me
punching terror through my skin,
a permanent reminder of endurance
when all feels so endlessly lost
this is me
with a stainless steel medal
to remind the world who the fuck
they’re dealing with.
as she stung my nose with alcohol
placed on that blue clamp
found my perfect sweet spot
though I was just relieved to know
part of me had one amongst
my external prickle
my girl laid her palm on my hand
as a needle went through
I sat amazed that five years
of questioning this piercing
was reduced to no tears
no flinching
just a quick pinch and it was done
while I glanced in a mirror
to the gnarly sight of a canula
hanging from my freshly
jabbed septum, heart so loud
you could hear it in the street.
In hospital, needles where items
of pure fear, robbing my blood,
spearing my spine, collecting
fluids and test results daily
punctuating torment
with purple exclamation marks.
I thought over it all as I sat
on a leather bed, cold metal
hanging from my face
knowing that this one meant more
knowing I’d conquered something
that I am a lame creature existing
in a curious world of agony.
This was me, all me
taking control of the misery that binds
a court jester before a king of pain
this was me
punching terror through my skin,
a permanent reminder of endurance
when all feels so endlessly lost
this is me
with a stainless steel medal
to remind the world who the fuck
they’re dealing with.
Published 28th May 2024
| Edited 3rd Jun 2024
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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The author encourages honest critique.
28th May 2024 12:52pm
28th May 2024 11:07pm
Thanks! I was particularly proud of this one and the meaning and the message behind it. Control is a very good word.
Thanks for dropping in
-M
Thanks for dropping in
-M
28th May 2024 4:49pm
Powerful and brave to take your fears to the face (literally) and then create such a beautiful piece to memorialize the experience. I love how you depicted the moment. Xx
28th May 2024 11:08pm
Aww thanks m’dear. I really enjoyed the meaning behind this piece. I’m enjoying my new souvenir even more.
I really enjoy your thoughts on this. Thank you.
-M
I really enjoy your thoughts on this. Thank you.
-M
28th May 2024 10:00pm
Why does it sometimes feel that deliberately adding a new wound, on our terms, is so powerful? I relate to this one...tattoos call to me in this way
28th May 2024 11:10pm
Haha… yeah I get what you mean about tattoos too. I’ve always been more into piercings. I’m not even sure why. Maybe it is because they feel more like wounds. That you pour energy into healing them. It’s cathartic in a lot of ways.
Thanks for dropping in on this one.
-M
Thanks for dropping in on this one.
-M
29th May 2024 4:33pm
I think part of it come from being able to choose, so much of life is suffering or struggle with it being externally sourced and we have no say, or internally sourced and we still have no say… I.e my back hurts, why the ruck does it hurt, why can’t I make it stop, it’s like our body betrays us sometimes and we just have to live with it.
But with this you make the choice and you have time to ride the adrenaline, the dump of endorphins and finally the sharp bite of sharpened steel.
Even the aftercare we chose this and we choose the consequence that come from it.
But with this you make the choice and you have time to ride the adrenaline, the dump of endorphins and finally the sharp bite of sharpened steel.
Even the aftercare we chose this and we choose the consequence that come from it.
29th May 2024 1:59am
