Embrace

how do I set my thoughts on fire
and watch them dance on the sky
how do I unfeel a dreadful desire
of ever wanting to die

die by choking, die by bleeding
die as I am a miserable mistake
never enough - always weeping
over some trite heartache

ache is my new best friend
bound together now and hereafter
till all my hopes meet an end
and my insanity bursts in laughter

laughter's all behind my back
how could I be so naive
again to fall to the same trap
yet I still believe - I believe

I buy my own flowers
I savour my tears
for hours and hours
I bathe in my fears

I believe in the whispers of shadows
thriving ferociously in my head
building higher, thicker walls of prisons
so lonely wishing I was dead

dead as every goddamn dream
suicide's my only escape
the only unshackled lightbeam
delightfully numbing embrace

I buy my own flowers
I savour my tears
I live with my monsters'
delightfully numbing embrace