Phantom Mask

I don’t want to be a writer anymore.
 I don’t want to feel the constant need to pick up a pen and paper to get my feelings out.
 All because simply my mouth is zipped shut.
 The only way to hear anything about me is through my writing. It's the only way I feel, I touch, I see, it's the only way I am me. I'm constantly putting on a show for others so I don't have the unbearing thoughts of if they will like me or not. But with writing I can show the true me. Saying things that I could never tell a person. My heart just wants to be liked by others and I'm tired of hearing how confident I am when I'm just the masked phantom. I lie about my personality so people dont hurt my soul. I used to have an armored heart but now I wear it on my sleeves for everyone to pierce. But I can't tell anyone that because then they will put their daggers in ten times deeper until they see my heart start to blue and lose its beats.