Death Obsessed

I'm thinking about it again
Constantly  
Every morning
Throughout the day
At night
I no longer can sleep
This obsession has consumed all thoughts
It's devoured me
Blackened what little I had left in my heart
Imagining different ways to die
Reenacting the words I write
Bringing them to life  
In my imagination
In my dreams
In my real life
My death
Created thoughts inspire my dark spectrum
The only happiness in my mind
Is that of my death
Why
How do I make my these thoughts stop
How do I change being
Death obsessed
The clouds of darkness rained on me
Lightning suffocated by my black hole  
Of emptiness
Thunder echoed my minds storm
Exploding louder
Closer
My blank canvas painted black
The present my future and my past
My life  
Death obsessed