deepundergroundpoetry.com
Liberated Madness
- Liberated Madness -
The whispers in the dark keep reminding me of dark hurts...
the voices, of all those who have made me cry, remembered.
So many times I cut myself until the blood did even squirt,
because I longed to see those who harmed me dismembered.
The cuts healed, but the memories of past tragedies remain,
until I laugh when I mean to cry, and cry when I should laugh.
Did they want to make me a monster, through so much pain,
those who bullied me and tortured me with such hellish craft?
Is this why I have such adoration for children as I always do,
because their innocence reminds me that mine is not fully lost...
No matter how people have tried to bury it as torments ensue,
that light remains a part of me, and I keep it no matter the cost!
This is what I see in her, and in others like her as I have loved,
a radiance undimmed, a perfection that cannot be extinguished.
It is what I would most preserve of humanity, and not remove,
if I could remake the universe, complete what was unfinished.
That purity children possess, that capacity for wonder as well,
and the sort of bravery that laughs in the face of dire challenge.
If all were like that, there would be no torments and not a hell,
for all would be filled with joy, even if that may sound strange.
It is not wrong to want to make people smile and know of joy,
instead of sadness, and yet people say I am the one who is mad.
For being myself, they would see me gone, see me even to die,
claiming that me being different is something unnatural or bad.
If sanity is the abandonment of magic, wonder, and all smiles,
then I would rather be insane, and at least be able to be content.
She is just like me, the one I love, in her lunacy and her styles,
ever laughing, even through tears; ever love's ecstatic celebrant.
We are both damaged beyond repair, both lost in wonderlands,
that only we can fully appreciate, and fathom the magic therein.
Yet, I feel whole when I am with her, holding her small hands,
kissing her soft lips, and relishing the deliciousness of our sins!
We are not more damaged than this world that made us suffer,
not more sinful than the society that claims love to be a shame.
To love without limitations, to live without restriction so sure,
is a delightful madness, and one that fills two hearts with flame.
Better to burn and blaze in ecstatic glory than to be snuffed out,
by those whose minds cannot comprehend the grandeur of love!
Let them rage against us, for in them is foolish fears and doubt,
whilst we shall be laughing at the end like a pair of sweet doves.
It is better to defy the world, than to live enslaved by any system...
and live and die with liberty, than in servitude to be condemned.
Only one who is like unto a child, can appreciate my mad heaven!
The whispers in the dark keep reminding me of dark hurts...
the voices, of all those who have made me cry, remembered.
So many times I cut myself until the blood did even squirt,
because I longed to see those who harmed me dismembered.
The cuts healed, but the memories of past tragedies remain,
until I laugh when I mean to cry, and cry when I should laugh.
Did they want to make me a monster, through so much pain,
those who bullied me and tortured me with such hellish craft?
Is this why I have such adoration for children as I always do,
because their innocence reminds me that mine is not fully lost...
No matter how people have tried to bury it as torments ensue,
that light remains a part of me, and I keep it no matter the cost!
This is what I see in her, and in others like her as I have loved,
a radiance undimmed, a perfection that cannot be extinguished.
It is what I would most preserve of humanity, and not remove,
if I could remake the universe, complete what was unfinished.
That purity children possess, that capacity for wonder as well,
and the sort of bravery that laughs in the face of dire challenge.
If all were like that, there would be no torments and not a hell,
for all would be filled with joy, even if that may sound strange.
It is not wrong to want to make people smile and know of joy,
instead of sadness, and yet people say I am the one who is mad.
For being myself, they would see me gone, see me even to die,
claiming that me being different is something unnatural or bad.
If sanity is the abandonment of magic, wonder, and all smiles,
then I would rather be insane, and at least be able to be content.
She is just like me, the one I love, in her lunacy and her styles,
ever laughing, even through tears; ever love's ecstatic celebrant.
We are both damaged beyond repair, both lost in wonderlands,
that only we can fully appreciate, and fathom the magic therein.
Yet, I feel whole when I am with her, holding her small hands,
kissing her soft lips, and relishing the deliciousness of our sins!
We are not more damaged than this world that made us suffer,
not more sinful than the society that claims love to be a shame.
To love without limitations, to live without restriction so sure,
is a delightful madness, and one that fills two hearts with flame.
Better to burn and blaze in ecstatic glory than to be snuffed out,
by those whose minds cannot comprehend the grandeur of love!
Let them rage against us, for in them is foolish fears and doubt,
whilst we shall be laughing at the end like a pair of sweet doves.
It is better to defy the world, than to live enslaved by any system...
and live and die with liberty, than in servitude to be condemned.
Only one who is like unto a child, can appreciate my mad heaven!
Published 2nd Aug 2023
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
reading list entries 0
comments 2
reads 212
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
21st Feb 2024 1:59am
There is more wisdom in what you write here than you realize, Kara. Never lose that wisdom! I know what it means to laugh when you mean to cry, or to cry when it is most unexpected. I laughed when my father died, and only later regretted doing that. I could not bring myself to cry for him, but I did cry when I was by myself and no doctors or the maid were around to hear me. You know what kind of man he was, but even so I felt pain at his passing when I did not want to or think I would or could. You write often about how much happiness you feel about children, and it is good to focus on happy things most especially in difficult times. Children do indeed possess much purity! Please, even when you are at your saddest do not cut yourself like you used to. It only brings further pain, and does not make the deeper pains we feel inside go away. I only say this because I love you and worry about you a lot. That said, this is a great poem, and I am happy to have enough time tonight to read some of your recent ones. Be safe and happy, darling!
I've been told I am wiser than I am intelligent most of the time, but there is nothing wrong with that, for certain. Yeah, I am a rather extremely, highly emotional person. When I feel something... it is like a wave gathering up inside of me and sooner or later it has to hit the shore and make itself fully manifest or it will only grow bigger and become harder to deal with. I am sorry to hear about your father, he wasn't a good man or even a decent one perhaps, but I understand that you did have some fond childhood memories to do with him that you cherished, so I totally respect that. When my mother died, I couldn't help but cry because even though she had been quite wickedly cruel to me far too often for it not be damaging to me in many ways, there were those few moments when I saw a different side of her, a gentler and kinder side, and the tears came uncontrollably when she died because of that. Then again, I have a bit of a gift for seeing the good in even people who seem utterly lost. All part of why I value compassion so highly! Since I give it so freely. I do have quite a deep fondness for children, they are like great lights in a dark world to my eyes, and in many ways... they understand things that adult minds simply cannot appreciate unless they tap into their childlike side. Those adults who still have one, that is. I have done much better of late with not cutting myself when I get upset, you are very much right in that it only makes the pains within worse when I do things like that. I am glad you enjoyed my poem, Cami! I will try to be safe, as always, my dear. I love you, also. :)
