All There Is

Once forgiven, twice removed
I never begged or played nice before
What makes you think
This time will be any different??

Starts out slow
Then it bites through
You pick up the pace
Scared and excited
Caught between wanting to stop
And wanting it to end

Tired
Too afraid to stop
Swimming for survival
Never needed a friend
Just a hand,
just another trying to live
For anything better

Once forgiven, twice removed
I never begged or played nice before
Strike a match and watch the flame
It's not your game, anymore

You start out angry
Then you drink to stop being sad
Seems life is more the problem
And that's all there is to be said

Feel the itch and you count change
Here we are again, in the fight
Down the rabbit hole
But there's no end in sight

Once forgiven, twice removed
I never begged or played nice before
Seems I'm one penny short
And life is not a dollar store