I want to

I want to write you a poem
but this isn't it
Because the poem I want to recite to you
Is too hard to put into words
The love bursting my heart into smithereens  
Is so overwhelming my brain cannot formulate
the words, will not bleed onto the page
So today I will put the cards on the table
Spread the from end to end starting with hearts
Putting all the 3's and 4's together  
so our favorite numbers can be hand in hand
Like when we rode the merry-go-round
On the horses you picked out for us
Since the day you shared your wish with me
You have been the most important person in the world to me
The happiness I feel whenever we are near
When I see your wonderful smile, I smile
I want to make your wish come true
To protect you and show you what your dream can be
What you deserved from birth  
I want to be there for you forever
Even though I know that cannot be
It is what I wish and tell God in my prayers  
So though this is not the poem that I want to write for you
Think of this note as an outline of jumbled feelings
Feelings seeking form and tempo
The way my heart beats find a their meter
You are everything to me, a living angel
I just want to return that feeling to you
a guardian as best I can be
the daddy you wished me to be
On a wonderful Summer's eve, you told me
So I will keep trying to find that poem inside me
Because I want you to know you are loved
I want you to know there are good men in the world
That just because some men are not man enough
You are an angel worthy of the treasure in my heart
Somehow I will impart my heart in verse