Loves Me Not: A Freeflow

If it wasn't love, then what was it???    
Obsession? Possession?
Addiction? Insanity???    
Tell me! What was it then?!?    
    
What can make someone act the way we did??    
What?!?    
    
What else can make time slow down?    
What else can make you want to risk everything?  
What else can make a human being more selfish?    
More focused? More desperate? More vulnerable?    
    
The thing I felt wasn't a magic little fairytale story,
There was no perfect ending.    
There was a tug-of-war, edge of madness ending.    
It was crying and kissing and holding tight,    
while saying goodbye!    
It was driving away unable to see the road ahead!
That THING!! It was nothing but a complete mess!
    
Love...    
It's supposed to be everything fluffy and cute!    
It's supposed to be undying & never harm felt!    
It's supposed to be sweet & make sense!    
It's supposed to be forever!!    
    
This....    
It left shards of glass buried in my heart!    
It left me jaded, it left me shattered!    
It burned me to the ground!    
What is the word for it???    
    
What makes you put everything else second?    
What traps you in a moment where nothing else matters?    
What makes you feel like a moth to a beautiful flame??    
    
What causes you to forget logic??    
What ties up your heart like that??    
What makes your whole body ache in a way that makes you want to run away!?    
What the hell comes banging at the door in your dreams, and makes you cry back to sleep!?!    
    
WHAT?!?    
    
What is the word for the best pain you've ever felt?  
The word for reckless passion?
Laughter for no good reason???    
Uncontrollable smiling because they are near??    
    
The word for every fiber of your being feeling as if it is, is literally, pulling you closer like a wild freaking magnet??    
    
What is the word for it, damn it??    
I need its name!    
Say it!!    
Someone please!    
    
Because if it wasn't love, I need to know what I felt.