vacation in italy

i sit up and rest the book I'm reading on my lap
to finish my beer
it's warm by now
i watch the calm pool in front of us
only a flight of swallows is churning up the water
by dipping themselves in it, occasionally
I'm thinking of dipping myself in it too
I lie back down and turn my head to my left to look at you
you're reading your book and the cigarette hanging on your lip has gone out
i know that you won't light it again
you never do
since waking up next to you three days ago I've been wanting to tell you that i love you
the urge came suddenly when you rolled over, hugged me, pressed my naked body against yours and smiled while doing so, eyes still closed,
your first impulse right after you woke up
you did something similar yesterday morning
and today morning
I've got five more potential mornings like these with you until we're back to our individual homes

maybe I'll tell you tonight
I'm not sure why it's so difficult for me
since you must already know
and nothing can ever be bad about being loved this way
even if you don't love me back