what i feel about "love"

   
     
     
     
    i don't believe in, "in love"; when it comes to "love"-"love" reminds me of there being a "level" you have to reach to obtain unlockable features not guaranteed to last....    
     
     
or perhaps like an expensive exclusive "drug", with more or less percentage "side effects" considering the stability in those envolved....    
     
     
 can't afford to "fall in love" without having "goals", "ambition", "success", amongst a long list of other things....    
     
     
 i personally will never get "married" nor bring "life" into this.."world" nor would i ever want to....as sure as my mind is set on that, against the grain is my one and only path....    
     
     
"introvert" to my core, is stamped; social engagement is variety levels of workout- communication, & initiative is forever a practice....    
     
     
those who understand, understand.... "life" is a "game" not everyone can overall stand....all the things it demands....daily "tests" and "objectives" to withstand....    
     
     
i prefer to exist as simple as i possibly can.... the polar opposite of the capitalistic program.... "love" is like "living above one's means"..people say "love" yourself before anything....    
     
     
the truth of the matter is.... some of us, are "surviving" on what ever "level" we're on- operating off fumes....    
     
     
the word is tossed around so much-it's just....like wear and tear....like old clothing one doesn't care much to wear....but.... the idea of sharing time with another person.... it's like the "right" person could reel you back quicker than you yourself could-make you "feel" as if you're not just existing because you're not "alone"....    
     
     
nothing or no one is "perfect".... though one could "dream" of that "perfect" one.... but in the end.... some will never experience nor feel that ones' worthy of an ideal "love"....      
     
     
because it might as well be equated to an expensive exclusive item that everyone can't afford- and in the end-a potential "expensive" loss....