You.........love me.

How can you say you love me
if just yesterday
and I quote
"I wish I have killed you when I had the chance"
you express these words to a total stranger
who had the power to put it in motion
my adoption

How can you say you love me
if every night
around twilight
you could hear my cries til sunlight
but your get high was more important

how can you say you love me
if just the other night
i can hear you in the hallway
as your sister brought in a man
to take away my innocence
and rip my hymen

how can you say you love me
when you used me to hide your drugs
in fear for my life
a high junkie came by looking for you
tearful begs to leave
stuttering words of please
as he knowingly and nervously
stabs me with a silver metal knife

how can you say you love me
as i ly here bleeding out
from the belly
while he's in a panic
looking for drugs
the drugs you gave me

how can you say you love me
when you told me to lie
to abuela and policia
tears of pain and sorrow
became
tears of hatred and anger

no more can you say you love me
as you took your last breath
September 12, 2006
i watched as your sister
stand by your bedside
you lifeless
with her false tears
and cold heart
that only i can see

in that moment
i don't know why
but here comes a tear
and the words
"I love you"