pandemic diary pt 2

the day george died    
i spilled a pot of boiling water down my body      
(my dad says it's because I'm not careful)
my neighbor, old and retired      
cancelled a gardening date with
her daughter to drive me      
to the ER      
they wouldn't let her in, they had me stand alone
in line for reception      
my hands above my head, covered
in welts and boils      
tears streaming down my face, collecting  
on the edge of my mask      
six feet apart
 
they locked the hospital down      
and later i heard from people who knew
that cop's wife      
that she changed her name and disappeared      
       
       
       
I'm so sorry josie      
she was made of fire, the first time i met her      
was on valentine's day in 2017
she had blue hair      
wearing that short blue dress, i could
never forget that dress or      
the first time we kissed      
       
she got pepper sprayed in the face at the protests      
wearing a shirt that i gave her      
laughing in photos as medics poured milk in her eyes      
       
she's gone now too      
it's impossible to think that i could live longer than a girl      
who i only ever imagined with flowers in her hair and laughed at pain      
when i can't even make pasta
or protect a friend      
before it's too late