Day Dreaming / Dreaming al Day

In a world of make believe. I find myself over and over again,
Sometimes I’m a tall strong man, fearless and cold.
Sometimes a scared little boy curled up in a corner.
Sometimes I’m happy, friendly and full of life.
Sometimes I’m mad, aggressive and ready to end it all.
Allot of the time, in between the sometimes, I forget at times.
That my time is shared, I don’t recognize the awful signs.

I wake up in the bedroom, ready to begin the day.
It suddenly stops and ends and repeats again.
And before I know it I’m having diner, not remembering today.
Still awake, focused and sharp I try to enjoy my evening.
Ready to get lost in another story but my own.
Watch a movie, read a book, play a videogame.
Ready to leave my existence behind, into the unknown.

This time it’s my turn to live a day in my shoes,
We’re off to a good start, productive, professional and overall pleasant.
Having lunch with colleague’s and discussing the weekend.
Where have you been Stephan, how was your vacation?
I do not remember going on vacation. Have I been away?
Have you already forgotten? You were on leave until today.

Jokingly I laugh and save myself out of the conversation,
I look them right in the eyes and start making shit up.
Off course my vacation was good, well rested but already tired.
The secret is, I’m always tired, in a constant exhausted state.
This days seems long and endless, bright and stretched.
 Going on and on and on, please make it go away.
I can’t take it any longer, not a single day.