A Letter

“A Letter”

It is no way for you to live
Knowing the only one who can forgive
You beyond the Gates of someone else’s Heaven
Doesn’t know you want to be forgiven.
They mean a lot to you, do they not?
The things that everyone else forgot…
Wouldn’t you like to die, and drive them out
Of your mind—its all you think about
And you fear your final thought
Will be the sins everyone else forgot.
But, William, no-one is blaming you, except for you.
No-one is blaming you for what you chose to do.
No-one blames you, except the voice in your head
Turn the narrative around, so that you speak instead.
It’s easier said than done—you’ve wasted so many years
Wanting that difference—dying to tell them your fears…
You’d just like everything to dream itself away
So that the words you dare not say
Could just go…could just disappear into smoke and mirrors
Everything is so misguided, and you’re out of tears.
But William, no-one blames you except for you
No-one expected you to know what to do.
It’s just no way to live, feeling buried in your past,
Fearing it will haunt you when you breathe your last.
But you don’t care anymore…if Hell is waiting
It can’t be worse than what the ghosts are stating.
You’ve spent so many years debating,
Fighting yourself for what does not count.
For things that do not even amount
To memories. You take so much blame
For things others neither feel nor can name.
It’s just no way to live, is it? And your cigarettes
Are just helping you feed on your regrets.
Everyone is watching you die for a cause
That nobody knows about, and you’ll die because
You think it’s the right thing to do.
But nobody is blaming you except for you.

You were just doomed to love too deeply.
You were just friends too completely
With perfect disguises that were not enough
To keep your mind safe from all that was.
You were just doomed to love too deeply.
You were just doomed to love too deeply.

© 2022 Marten Hoyle